How To Stop Lying To Yourself
Part 2 Of A Three Step Process To Uncover and Demolish Your Limiting Beliefs
By Jinny Ditzler
Step 2 How Do I Explain my Limitations? (Click here to view Step 1)
The Most Important Part Of This Whole Exercise:
Now it’s time to discover how you explain these behaviors with statements that are actually your limiting beliefs or paradigms. Perhaps you can understand better how to uncover these limiting thoughts and feelings by filling in the blanks in the following sentence.
I would really love to _________, but I can’t because _________.”
STOP – be sure to complete the sentence above (in your mind is fine), before you move on.
What you wrote in the second space is a limiting belief of yours – maybe a really strong one. You have assumed this statement to be true and allowed it to stop you, just as if there were a brick wall in front of you. Things are only true if we believe they are. Here are some examples of limiting beliefs:
o It doesn’t matter how much I exercise, my butt will still be huge.
o I’m too old to look for a better job.
o I’m so unattractive, no one would be interested in me.
o I’ll never be rich – I’m lucky to be earning what I do.
o I haven’t got enough time to do what really matters to me.
o It doesn’t really matter what I eat – I’ll be OK.
Statements like these are limiting beliefs. These statements are not true – they are just habitual, negative beliefs that you have about yourself and your chances of success. As long as they’re in charge, you’re lost.
Use this exercise to become more aware of your limiting beliefs so you’ll recognize them when they occur to you—and have a chance to ignore them.
To discover more of your limiting paradigms, look at the list of ways you limit yourself that you made in Step 1. Read each statement and ask yourself the question, Why do I do that? OR Why don’t I do that?
Write down everything and every statement that occurs to you – don’t let one get away. Until you become aware of this limiting self-talk, it will be in charge. Once you’re aware of your limiting beliefs, your next step is to find out which one is having the strongest negative effect on you right now.
Put your list of limiting beliefs in front of you. First look through the list and imagine that all of these statements are absolutely true. There is NOTHING you can do to change them. Given that this is the case, what are your chances for success? What will your future look like with these beliefs in charge?
OK – they really aren’t true. But we sure act as if they are, don’t we? What a great accomplishment to discover these limiting beliefs. Good job.
The last part of Step 2 is to look back over this list again, and choose the one belief that has the strongest negative effect on you right now. Which one is really holding you back? Which one do you really believe is true? Draw a big circle around that one and label it: My Strongest Limiting Paradigm.
Between now and the time you read about Step 3, start to notice how many times you hear yourself thinking this statement – or even saying it to other people. Don’t try to do anything except just become aware of how much a part of your life this belief has become. You’ll probably be as shocked as I am, every time I uncover another limiting belief.
My strongest limitation belief this year is: "I used to be a great writer, but I’m too old now. The words just don’t come the way they used to – my brain just isn’t working the way it used to." And I have a LOT of proof that this belief was true!! I was having a hard time writing anything that doesn’t sound really stupid. The words used to flow from my fingers to the keys, now it was an impossible struggle. I even hired a writing coach, and my writing was still blah, blah, blah! Stay tuned to find out what happened.
One more bit of food for thought:
Every belief, statement, point of view, thought, assumption or paradigm that doesn’t point us in the direction of the results we want is a LIMITING BELIEF!!
Think about it.
Click Here To Continue On To The Third And Final Step Of This Process
Jinny Ditzler has been a corporate and personal development coach for 30 years and is the creator of "Best Year Yet Online" Best Year Yet is a proven and guaranteed system that teaches you the secret to successful goal setting. When you set the right goals, and put a system around them that guarantees you follow through- your results will follow! Click here to learn more about the Best Year Yet Online System.