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Bad Childhood and Adult Health
New blog post up on research done at Kaiser and the CDC studying the long term health effects of childhood adversity. Very interesting.
Mon. Feb 20, 9:05am
I'm glad to see this topic being addressed on this site. I believe that a lot of people who deal with obesity are dealing with the effects of childhood trauma. I often see comments on this site negating the impact of these experiences and suggest that people need to just get over it and stop making excuses.
Monday, February 20, 2006, 9:31 AM
I am a survivor or childhood trauma...I no longer consider myself a victim, but rather survivor. It sounds harsh to hear people say "Get over it", but in reality, that's what you have to do. For those who have experienced adversities in their lives, opt to look at it as a map to life. You've been down that road before...so choose to take another path. You are in the driver's seat, so take advantage of it.
Monday, February 20, 2006, 10:05 AM
I am happy for you that the issues of your childhood have provided you with this map to life, but don't think that you should expect all people to deal with these issues in the same way. For me, it's a cyclical thing. Some days I do great and can go for a period of time focused on health. Then, something will happen and I revert back to old habits to make myself feel better. Sometimes, those old habits are the only thing I have to prevent me from doing something worse. I'd like to think some day I'll just be "over it" but experience tells me that more likely, I'll learn to adapt to it and make the best of a bad situation. I'll do my best, but sometimes my best is to eat a piece of chocolate cake, and I think that's ok and doesn't make me a failure.
Monday, February 20, 2006, 10:57 AM
"getting over it"
I guess if I could just get over it, I wouldn't have to be logging my food on peertrainer every day and looking for support from strangers to prevent me from bingeing.
Monday, February 20, 2006, 2:01 PM
When I say I'm a survivor, I AM saying that I am in control of my own choices and actions now...unlike when I was a child...therefore, I work really hard EVERYDAY to not latch onto my pains nor recreate the past. I can't...because if I allow myself to dwell on past pains, I will literally die! I've been down that distructive path before...but, no more. That's not to say I don't still have bad days, because I do (days that would make it really easy to have pitty on myself) but I know that to be a reality, so I allow myself that emotion. But, then I fight like heck to find a way to use it as a catalyst to overcome and become a stronger, better person for it. That's all.
Just realize that past pains will always be a part of you, but it doesn't have to control you. Fight like heck to allow it to drive you to better days and better ways. :-)
Monday, February 20, 2006, 2:37 PM
survivor vs. victim
I'm so glad to see someone using the word "cyclical" in this context. I spent 5+ years in (talk) therapy to come to the conclusion (among just a handful of others) that my struggle to "move on" is cyclical; some days are great but sometimes a "trigger" will set me back. And I just have to fight to pull myself back out again. In addition to therapy, I have also read a lot of good stuff on this (anything by "Sark" is really uplifting!!) But I'm always looking for good reading on this topic. And I wonder if this quest to read about childhood pain & its effect on adult health/decision-making makes me a survivor or a victim!?
Monday, February 20, 2006, 9:49 PM
i'm so glad people are being honest about this. one thing i've noticed about peertrainer is if you aren't being "becky cheerleader super motivator," people are always trying to "cheer you up" and be all "dr. phil" on you. i am dealing with this as a lifelong issue and will for the rest of my life. i'm happy i'm at a place where i'm doing better, but i'd really like to have people to talk to when i'm having a bad day, too. it's not that i don't get it or don't want to be positive, it's just that some days i'm not and that's ok. i know it's ok and i know i'll get better again. i just need someone who will listen and not berate me and tell me to "buck up." i know i need to do that. nobody knows better than i do.
Monday, February 20, 2006, 9:55 PM
I think the cheery mode of Peertrainer helps offset the negative thoughts that go on in my head. But, like the first responder mentioned, Peertrainer threads often tend toward "negating" the impact of childhood experience. I think all of us on this thread agree that "negating" doesn't do anybody any good. The tension seems to me to be about whether pain can be used as a catalyst for change/taking charge. I believe it can be in theory. In practice I find it challenging sometimes to turn anger in to positive thinking (a.k.a. the "driver's seat" mode).
I work on 'managing' anger/pain, rather than negating it. I read a book about writing once that said that writers must not wait to be "unscared" before going ahead with the writing; likewise, I try to not wait to be "unscared" before going ahead and trying new things that could help me be happy. (One trick I use to change my mindset is to allow these things to be really small: such as more time outside!)
Monday, February 20, 2006, 10:22 PM
"don't wait to be unscared"
I love it! What a good motto for life.
"To be brave is to behave
bravely when your heart is faint.
So you can be really brave
only when you really ain't."
-- Piet Hein
Monday, February 20, 2006, 11:14 PM
I love Dr. T & Piet Hein!
To the past two posters: Thanks for passing that site and poem on. I'm so glad to "meet" people who are also working on this stuff. Like I said before, I've always taken a relatively lonely approach to it (via talk therapy) rather than actually "talking" to others. Let's be friends! :)
Tuesday, February 21, 2006, 7:41 AM
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