EMAIL THREAD Trying to stay on my diet but don't want to look stupid on a date I know that guys like to see a girl that orders more than a salad, but I'll also blow my whole week, drinking, eating steak, dessert etc. Any tips? Mon. Jul 11, 5:00pm

Don't worry about what he thinks. Try eating a dinner high in fiber (a big salad is totally fine) and take no more than 2 bites of a dessert. If it goes well, maybe order a dessert with 2 forks. I think if you avoid eating a fatty steak and a whole dessert and focus on portion control I think you will be fine. Good luck on the date! Monday, July 11, 2005, 5:13 PM

What the previous poster said -- don't worry about what he thinks. Also, you can have a healthy meal without sticking to salad only. How about broiled fish and 2 sides of veggies instead of mashed potatoes or fries? Or how about gazpacho instead of salad? If you know in advance where you're going, call them and ask if they have a website with menus, and familiarize yourself with their options. You might also try ordering an appetizer sized entree instead of a regular entree. Most of all, though, resist the impulse to talk about whether or not you're on a diet -- and if the guy makes a comment about your meal such as 'what? You're only having salad?' or 'Don't you want a steak?' you can simply say something along the lines of 'I prefer to eat lighter meals when it's so hot and humid out -- I sleep better' or simply say, 'because I really like nice crunchy veggies.' And then change the subject to something else. Personally, I'd think that any guy who was commenting on what I was or was not eating on a date wasn't exactly being a gentleman. Just sayin'. Monday, July 11, 2005, 7:04 PM

If he doesn't like you for what you are eating...then he may not be the right kind of guy for you. Stick to your guns and keep on track with your goals. A man worth keeping in your life will appreciate your healthy lifestyle and maintain his own as well. Tuesday, July 12, 2005, 6:27 AM

Seriously: Don't worry about what he says, do what YOU need to do. As long as you're not complaining about what HE'S eating, there shouldn't (if he is considerate) be a problem. My last boyfriend made all sorts of editorial comments about what I was eating. If he was having steak, he wanted to point out I needed to be more 'low carb' if I was having a salad and pasta. If he was having ice cream, he'd tell me 'oh c'mon.....just HAVE some!' when I said I'd pass. And I gave in a lot -- not because I didn't want to stay on track, but because I was tired of being nagged. After 5 months of dating, I'd put on 12 lbs. And after 5 months of dating, I realized (along with more crucial relationship issues) that a lot of his nagging me to eat the way he did was because he didn't really want to eat healthy himself, and it was easier for him to continue to carry an extra 75 lbs and to take lipitor than it was for him to get off his ass and exercise and eat better. Tuesday, July 12, 2005, 7:03 AM

Do guys really care about what you eat? PErsonally, as a guy, I don't see why you can't eat whatever you want on your date. If the date's going well, he's not going to care what you're eating unless he's some kind of control freak or food nazi. If it was me, and my date was eating salad, I would think, Good, fitness is important to her. Tuesday, July 12, 2005, 11:47 AM

Don't get into an argument about a salad. It's not worth it to spoil a good time that way. Have grilled fish and vegetables and maybe a salad as well, no potatoes or rice. Have a white wine spritzer for your drink, (it's half the wine) and have fruit for dessert and don't eat it all. Once you get to know the guy, you can rearrange all these things, and he will know you better, and know what you eat. Also, don't diet. Just change your habits from unhealthy to healthy eating. That will affect your mindset, so that you are never thinking, "I'm going off my diet". Healthy eating allows for occasional splurges, and a special date can certainly be one of them. Tuesday, July 12, 2005, 1:10 PM

Thank you to the above male poster for being normal and recognizing that fitness is important to both men and women, and that all of our hardwork should not go out the window to 'impress' some guy that thinks steak is a breakfast, lunch, and dinner kind of food. If only there were more of you... Tuesday, July 12, 2005, 1:38 PM

If you're going out with someone that is making you feel this way, lose him quickly! Otherwise, I would try to remember that a meal choice won't make or break a true connection. Wednesday, July 13, 2005, 2:53 PM

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