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To Each His/Her Own But..

I know that we are free to leave and join groups but I hate it when people just leave without saying its not working out. I find it rude and insensitive because they become like a friend and you know so much about them and share so much. And no i will not start a group and invite them even if I liked being in a group with them.

Mon. May 21, 1:10pm

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Sometimes they are removed by the system because they haven't logged for 7 days.

Monday, May 21, 2007, 1:22 PM

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Also, they might be in a really bad place. I've lost group members suddenly and it's just too much for them to deal with the "non-real" people (us) in their lives. Sometimes they reappear a few months later and 10 lbs heavier...it's always inspiring to see them ready to take charge of their bodies again, no matter what.

Monday, May 21, 2007, 1:56 PM

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This person was very active several times a day and was supportive with everyone.

Monday, May 21, 2007, 4:29 PM

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look, i'm not trying to offend the op with this comment, so please keep that in mind. but, the tone of the op's comment is a little "needy" and "pissy" to me. maybe the person who left felt the same way. often it is difficult to gain the meaning of the written word, what with no inflections and all. sorry, but i thought it should be said.

Monday, May 21, 2007, 4:35 PM

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4:35pm - Well said, I was thinking the exact same thing. If a group's not doing it for me, I'll leave. It's nothing personal, but sometimes its about doing what works for me - not what'll make others happy. Maybe your group member was needing a different environment than your group was providing...

Monday, May 21, 2007, 5:08 PM

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True 4.35, but the OP was not just complaining about members leaving, but rather about them leaving without saying something first.

I'd probably feel the same way if someone I'd considered a friend on here disappeared without warning. But I guess they may have their reasons.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007, 8:06 AM

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I meant 5.08, not 4.35, sorry.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007, 8:07 AM

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Op here.Thanks for your comments. If two people agreed I am being too needy it must be true. I know I was in a stressed pissy mood when I wrote that. Better today and I will try not let it get to me so much when a liked group member just disappears.I know I probably have some "abandonment issues" from the past LOL. I am new to this internet stuff and I act like we are all friends like in life. I think its best to just leave a quick this isn't working out good luck and leave the group on a more positive note.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007, 9:37 AM

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you know, when i first joined one group, a very social group, i tried to read the logs and comments and keep up with the personal lives of the other group members as best as i could. but, ultimately, it was draining and taking time away from the weight loss journey i had set out on. i had to read the logs from a while back to know what some of the comments meant. i also did not want to spend so much time answering questions about my pets or how long i'd been single or why was i stressed about my job. i mean, i have friends in real life, who i can see and hang out with, who know my situation without me having to provide a bunch of background info to solicit advice. i personaly did not come to this site to socialize, but i came here to get support for the weaknesses in my exercise routine and diet. i only realized that after finding it so difficult to keep up socially with my group mates. so i started my own, personal, one-person group and moved on to what works for me. i did not say goodbye to the group, it didn't even cross my mind. not because i'm callous or anything, but because i was focused on my goals and set out to meet them. i guess some people on the site have more time to spend logging and chatting and enjoy the social aspects, but not everyone. good luck to you all!!

Tuesday, May 22, 2007, 10:30 AM

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