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Roberta's Reflections: Musings of a Psychotherapist

A PEERtrainer Series on The Psychology of Weight Loss and Health

The Myth Of Low Self Esteem In Overweight People

By Roberta Temes, PhD

Did you know that the idea of a fat person having low self esteem is a myth? Humans come in various shapes and sizes. Every psychological test given to overweight people indicates that if you are fat you are as mentally healthy, or unhealthy, as anyone in the general population. There is nothing about overeating that is associated with poor emotional health. In fact, it is possible that obese people are emotionally stronger that slim people because many slim folks who were interviewed said they'd stay at home if they were obese.. they would not have the psychological fortitude to be seen in public if they were heavy.

There was a time, right here in the USA, when only the most successful folks were heavy and everyone else tried to emulate them. Large bodies were proof of robust health and substantial wealth. But, in America in the 21st century fat is out, thin is in.

Obesity is not a psychological disorder. Obesity is not an eating disorder. Fat people have a genetic predisposition to gain weight and if they wish to conform to today's ideal of slimness and if they want to maintain good health, they must counteract their inborn biological impulses. This is possible. Difficult, but possible. Particularly possible if you have a diet buddy or buddies.

Our genes may give us the capacity and tendency to eat much and gain much, but it is our environment, our habits, that permit the tendency to flourish. Thankfully, we can change our environment and thus fool Mother Nature. You can be a slim person, after all. You can counteract your inborn biologic capacity.

Dr. Jules Hirsch, the famous obesity researcher at Rockefeller University, says that obesity should be treated as a chronic disease for which there is no cure but for which there are management techniques. And those techniques do work. But, it's up to you to apply them every day.

You override your genetic destiny when you eat when you are not hungry or when you eat only low-calorie foods when you are hungry. It's the gene that opens your mouth that is responsible for overeating.

How do you want to manage your weight? You can do it, you know. You can go for surgery and staple your stomach. You can go to a diet doctor and get lots of pills. You can stop eating solids and go on a liquid diet. You can get group support via the Internet. You can lessen urges by acupressure, acupuncture, or aversion therapy. You can count calories or fat grams. You can use hypnosis. And the list goes on and on. There is no shortage of diet programs.

In my practice everyone who wants to lose weight does lose because we add hypnosis to the mix. Hypnotic suggestions make it easier to stick to whatever program you decide to follow. And it is crucial to follow a program. Talk to others and find out about a program that may be new to you. Remember, any diet program will work if you follow it.

Roberta Temes Article Archive:

    Click Here To Read How Roberta Can Help You Eliminate the Psychological Barriers Keeping You from Following Your Diet. Her program comes with an iron-clad 1 YEAR no questions asked money back guarantee and it's easy to order. If you like Roberta's writing style, you'll probably like her approach to helping you lose weight!

    About the Author

    Roberta Temes, (pronounced Temmis), Ph.D. is Clinical Assistant Professor, Department of Psychiatry, at Downstate Medical School, New York City. She had a private practice in New York City in psychotherapy, coaching, and medical hypnosis for 30 years, and has now relocated that practice to Westfield, NJ.

    Temes is the author of many self-help books and psychology books, as well as the first medical school textbook about hypnosis. She is also the author of the best-selling book, The Complete Idiot's Guide to Hypnosis. Her latest book is called, The Tapping Cure.

    Dr. Temes lectures around the country at corporate meetings, at medical conferences, and at health spas, too. She did a stint as a columnist for a country newspaper where she wrote about acquiring a country house and the trauma of adjusting to fresh air, quiet, and nature. For twenty years Temes wrote a monthly column for True Story magazine. Dr. Roberta, as her clients call her, is now in practice in NJ where she lives with her husband. Her 3 children are grown, with families of their own.

    "The research is mounting: hypnosis can help you lose weight and keep it off longer . . . This set Enjoying Weight Loss has a lot to offer: a warm, fun hypnotist offering sound dietary advice and a variety of trances for a range of issues, from choosing a food plan to avoiding temptation."

    -Jean Fain, Harvard Medical School

    May 2006 Thread Archive. Back to Previous Page

Topic: Replies: Last Post:
Serious Team looking to Seriously lose 16 Wed. May 31, 10:26pm
work at home or uncommon work schedule challenges/benefits 0 Wed. May 31, 10:19pm
Calories in a Baguette! 5 Wed. May 31, 6:32pm
Ways to eat more vegetables: what do you do? 19 Wed. May 31, 4:52pm
Thanks for Understanding, Bridezillas! 6 Wed. May 31, 4:48pm
HELP- MY GROUP PAGE IS WHITE 3 Wed. May 31, 4:31pm
I need some support 0 Wed. May 31, 4:26pm
I don't like the taste of water. 33 Wed. May 31, 3:00pm
need posters 6 Wed. May 31, 12:18pm
Dunkin Donuts coffee question 15 Wed. May 31, 10:35am
good but inexpensive walking shoes 7 Wed. May 31, 5:27am
I need support in giving support. 14 Wed. May 31, 5:23am
Trust...OT 37 Wed. May 31, 12:54am
Quickie, daily ab workout? 5 Wed. May 31, 12:29am
OT: Any Texans own an Obra home? 0 Tue. May 30, 6:02pm
Help! I need suggestions for a BBQ... 12 Tue. May 30, 3:29pm
OT?-new clothes-unimpressed? 22 Tue. May 30, 3:17pm
This one spot... 5 Tue. May 30, 12:16pm
Out of Control and don't know how to regain control 11 Tue. May 30, 8:54am
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New Members wanted! 0 Tue. May 30, 4:25am
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running club 0 Mon. May 29, 5:17pm
20 SOMETHING WEIGHT WATCHERS 2 Mon. May 29, 1:56pm
Snack Foods 8 Mon. May 29, 6:19am
New Group 0 Sun. May 28, 10:35pm
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nursing 7 Thu. May 25, 2:52pm
Turbo Jam Team? 5 Thu. May 25, 2:09pm
Heart rate monitors and calorie counts 2 Thu. May 25, 7:48am
another question for the men 14 Wed. May 24, 8:34pm
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Calories calculated on heart rate monitor are lower 12 Wed. May 24, 1:44pm's everywhere! 2 Wed. May 24, 12:36pm
links 1 Wed. May 24, 12:04am
this is really cool 6 Tue. May 23, 6:54pm
protein supplement 2 Tue. May 23, 2:25pm
Kids exercising with you. 6 Tue. May 23, 1:15pm
weight loss and breast/shoe size 13 Tue. May 23, 8:03am
Goal reached... Now what?? 6 Tue. May 23, 6:10am
29-year-old office staffer trying to lose 10 pounds 0 Mon. May 22, 11:22pm
American Idol - only 3 left! 12 Mon. May 22, 7:39pm
Dogs and bikes 10 Mon. May 22, 7:35pm
Established group needs some energy 0 Mon. May 22, 7:32pm
Best advice to new users gettting started with PT? 3 Mon. May 22, 2:40pm
conversion link 3 Mon. May 22, 1:55pm
Mcdonalids: quarter pounder with cheese vs. a crispy chicken club with bacon 3 Mon. May 22, 10:35am
Best Protein? 7 Mon. May 22, 6:04am
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What to eat at Market Broiler 0 Sun. May 21, 11:47am
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Let's get fit for 2006! 0 Sat. May 20, 5:39pm
Let's get fit for 2006! 0 Sat. May 20, 5:30pm
"New" group: Chicago Fit Challenge: 1 Sat. May 20, 5:15pm
Protien or Carbs for post-workout recovery 6 Sat. May 20, 8:04am
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my husband's health - - like I need MORE stuff to do! 3 Fri. May 19, 9:13pm
ER - how do you interpret the end? 3 Fri. May 19, 1:40pm
got excercise? Neither do I 0 Fri. May 19, 1:23pm
got excercise? Neither do I 0 Fri. May 19, 1:23pm
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Funny things that go hand in hand with taking better care of yourself . . . 11 Fri. May 19, 1:08pm
Navy Seals Workout 0 Fri. May 19, 10:25am
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To the Men of PT 3 Fri. May 19, 8:12am
hungry after eating vegetarian food 10 Fri. May 19, 8:06am
What's the bonus benefit of doing >30 mins of cardio? 16 Thu. May 18, 9:52pm
meal presentation 9 Thu. May 18, 9:31pm
Want to be in the Disney Triathlon this year? Next Year? Any year in the future? 0 Thu. May 18, 7:07pm
trying to lose weight and train for a triathlon? 1 Thu. May 18, 10:38am
i love ice cream 28 Thu. May 18, 10:31am
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bowflex tread climber? 2 Thu. May 18, 7:34am
Slim fast? 31 Thu. May 18, 6:34am
ready to do this everyday 0 Wed. May 17, 7:56pm
ready to do this everyday 0 Wed. May 17, 7:55pm
Laura Doyle's "Surrendered Wife" 3 Wed. May 17, 6:03pm
fish oil?? 7 Wed. May 17, 5:39pm
Not a mother/father or a wife/husbad? 11 Wed. May 17, 4:54pm
fiber/lax pills 8 Wed. May 17, 1:41pm
Workout Tunes 2 Wed. May 17, 12:03pm
News Fast? 22 Wed. May 17, 10:20am
magazine fitness plans 4 Wed. May 17, 9:42am
Question.............fat vs fat? 6 Wed. May 17, 5:09am
Diet mantra for late at night?? 12 Wed. May 17, 5:02am
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Goal weight and unsatisfied:( 14 Tue. May 16, 10:59am
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mothers day gifts?? 8 Mon. May 15, 5:39pm
Body for Life 2 Mon. May 15, 1:59pm
Is movie style popcorn still fattening? 17 Mon. May 15, 1:54pm
Sleeping and Eating? 4 Mon. May 15, 1:42pm
back exercises 7 Mon. May 15, 1:17pm
yoga practice 4 Mon. May 15, 1:05pm
Is it genetic or what? 4 Mon. May 15, 12:31pm
OT: NJ Drivers, a question for you 0 Mon. May 15, 12:28pm
Openings! 0 Mon. May 15, 12:25pm
Huge breakdown. Please help me... 16 Mon. May 15, 8:38am
Weekend Posters Team? 3 Mon. May 15, 8:10am
Cinnamon 4 Mon. May 15, 1:52am
If calories were not an obstacle - WARNING!!! - do not read if not strong-willed 22 Mon. May 15, 12:32am
WOMAN Challenge 0 Sun. May 14, 6:41pm
Chat To Lose- Rare member opening! 2 Sun. May 14, 4:03pm
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!! 1 Sun. May 14, 2:18pm
3-Day Walkers? 6 Sun. May 14, 1:11pm
eating before/after working out dilemma! 3 Sun. May 14, 11:53am
High protein supplements 1 Sat. May 13, 10:45pm
thoughts on self-sabotage? 13 Sat. May 13, 3:02pm
FlyBabies? 26 Fri. May 12, 10:10pm
American Idol 26 Fri. May 12, 9:54pm
Members who do not post at all 14 Fri. May 12, 3:56pm
Weightlifting or cardio? 2 Fri. May 12, 3:40pm
Is Your Inner Diva Screaming to Get Out?? 0 Fri. May 12, 3:23pm
last logged posting time 3 Fri. May 12, 2:30pm
Building Muscle, Losing Fat??? 3 Fri. May 12, 10:45am
is drinking too much water bad for you? 8 Fri. May 12, 10:41am
personal trainer wannabe 1 Thu. May 11, 10:45pm
healthy drink? 11 Thu. May 11, 10:01pm
toning up w/ a limited time allowance 2 Thu. May 11, 6:36pm
Any other road warriors out there? 0 Thu. May 11, 5:42pm
scared of gaining it back... 2 Thu. May 11, 5:30pm
Slightly OT: career test sites? 1 Thu. May 11, 5:23pm
How often do you post to your group? 2 Thu. May 11, 5:06pm
sunglasses 4 Thu. May 11, 4:01pm
Grapples 14 Thu. May 11, 3:20pm
Losing Muscle 14 Thu. May 11, 1:59pm
Define "posting to group" 4 Thu. May 11, 12:41pm
Building Arm Muscle Using Own Bodyweight? 14 Thu. May 11, 11:43am
40 something - no children, no husband 7 Thu. May 11, 2:44am
mindfulness - new group? 2 Wed. May 10, 9:20pm
inspiration in person 3 Wed. May 10, 8:15pm
weight watchers worth it? 20 Wed. May 10, 6:11pm
Anyone else doing PUSH? 0 Wed. May 10, 4:17pm
HELP!! abour to cave... 5 Wed. May 10, 3:26pm
Kicking a member out 1 Wed. May 10, 12:48pm
Team in Training 9 Wed. May 10, 12:29pm
weight 9 Wed. May 10, 12:05pm
Daily Vitamin Suggestions? 0 Wed. May 10, 11:14am
Any intrest in buckling down for 3 weeks?New Group Potential 8 Wed. May 10, 10:16am
Oblivion 0 Tue. May 9, 5:46pm
Dancing/Workout Videos 8 Tue. May 9, 4:55pm
new group for weight watchers in the home stretch! 0 Tue. May 9, 3:19pm
Active Members Needed 0 Tue. May 9, 1:13pm
How can this be? 6 Tue. May 9, 12:56pm
boxing classes southern california 0 Tue. May 9, 12:51pm
I drink 6 cups of coffee a day and 16 Tue. May 9, 9:29am
Do you travel for work? 0 Tue. May 9, 12:50am
Do you travel for work? 0 Tue. May 9, 12:47am
Excercise! 7 Mon. May 8, 6:23pm
Join Our Team 0 Mon. May 8, 1:55pm
WEDDING VENDORS! 5 Mon. May 8, 1:03pm
Looking for group members - Weight Watchers method... 3 Mon. May 8, 11:25am
weightloss webpage 7 Mon. May 8, 2:10am
OT: Cell phone service providers?? 19 Sun. May 7, 11:50pm
woo hoo! 7 Sun. May 7, 7:52pm
Fitness Instructors 15 Sun. May 7, 7:35pm
help- i see no way out of eating late!! 9 Sun. May 7, 2:33pm
Are upi faced with middle age and over weight 0 Sun. May 7, 12:13pm
Hot Tea = water?? 5 Sun. May 7, 11:22am
How many folks want to walk down this road with me??? 0 Sat. May 6, 9:38pm
How many folks want to walk down this road with me??? 0 Sat. May 6, 9:37pm
OT birthday whine 4 Sat. May 6, 8:12pm
Healthy Vietnamese Food Options? 5 Sat. May 6, 4:51pm
Who left on american Idol???? 8 Sat. May 6, 12:15pm
Personal Trainer 1 Sat. May 6, 11:57am
not looking to drop pounds? 8 Sat. May 6, 8:28am
Positive reinforcement all the way! 0 Sat. May 6, 6:11am
My mom drives me nuts. Help. 21 Fri. May 5, 7:29pm
May 2 American Idol 16 Fri. May 5, 4:19pm
New diabetic 2 Fri. May 5, 2:19pm
Lookin to lose weight and get in shape 0 Fri. May 5, 2:06pm
formula for tracking trend weight 0 Fri. May 5, 11:55am
NEED 10K Runner for RELAY TEAM FOR DISNEY TRI 0 Thu. May 4, 11:11pm
Fruit! What did you eat today? 19 Thu. May 4, 7:56pm
are you on weight watchers?? 5 Thu. May 4, 6:10pm
Can eating too many carbs give you Type 2 diabetes? 1 Thu. May 4, 6:02pm
Diabetes Team Started 3 Thu. May 4, 11:18am
Weight Maintenance and Sanity!! 6 Thu. May 4, 11:08am
Tailgating 1 Thu. May 4, 9:19am
Weight Watchers 3 Wed. May 3, 10:28pm
sugar eatter 7 Wed. May 3, 9:54pm
Are you tired of being the only one who comments? 15 Wed. May 3, 9:35pm
Supermarket diet 0 Wed. May 3, 8:53pm
40 lbs or so by our 40th b-day's this year. 0 Wed. May 3, 6:35pm
First 5K! 13 Wed. May 3, 4:58pm
larabars? 8 Wed. May 3, 1:47pm
a great dessert/snack 12 Wed. May 3, 12:02am
Anyone is welcome 0 Tue. May 2, 10:17pm
Poll: Which veggies did you eat today? 19 Tue. May 2, 7:57pm
Lack of Support 5 Tue. May 2, 5:54pm
Beano 5 Tue. May 2, 5:31pm
Workout "Gear Find"... :-) 21 Tue. May 2, 4:48pm
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My One-Year Peertrainer Anniversary 9 Tue. May 2, 11:25am
Taeboe Boot Camp DVD 1 Tue. May 2, 10:50am
what is the most effective cardio? 18 Mon. May 1, 11:27pm
Internet Explorer vs. Mozilla Firefox Browser 6 Mon. May 1, 11:10pm
April 25 American Idol 22 Mon. May 1, 6:14pm
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NOTE TO SELF: Do not eat beans on days you workout at the gym! 21 Mon. May 1, 2:09pm
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NEW Spotlight! starts in less than 2 weeks. 4 Mon. May 1, 9:17am
weight Watchers 36 Mon. May 1, 5:00am