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How do I get over something I've been self-conscious about my entire life??

Okay, so I'm barely into my early 20s. Throughout my entire life, I've always been self-conscious about my voice and it's caused me so much anxiety and pain over it. I guess you could say I have a very soft voice. Throughout my life on numerous occasions, people have brought that up with me and make comments about it. Even worse, many many times during my childhood even once in awhile up to now, people from peers to adults have mocked my voice. I mean I know it sounds so silly to be so self-conscious about this, but it's truly affected my everyday living. For example, I don't like talking to someone where there are strangers around, in fear that they are making fun of me. Or talking on a cell phone around strangers. Etc, etc. What do I do? How should I respond to these comments? How do I not care about what others think of me?

Thanks for any help =D

Mon. May 5, 11:14pm

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Here's an idea - go to a voice coach. If it causes you this much anxiety, then a voice coach should be worth the cost, even if you put it on your credit card or get a loan.

Monday, May 05, 2008, 11:31 PM

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Also check into acting schools. They have classes that focus on projection and breathing and all the things about your voice that you can possibly retrain. Be picky about what class you take - adult community ed won't be as focused as you need.

Or do what I did - spend some time in the UK, where everyone will comment on how un-American your voice is, and mean that in a complimentary way. Our stereotype over there is that you can hear us before you see us.

Monday, May 05, 2008, 11:38 PM

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If you're barely into your early twenties, chances are you're still in that social mindset where what others think is more important than how you feel about yourself. I have had a scar on my left cheek since I was three years old from a fairly traumatic childhood incident. It was something I spent my entire life hiding; turning my face in pictures, wearing excessive amounts of makeup, putting my hair in front of my face, just completely ridiculous. As I've gotten older, I've realized that this scar is just a part of who I am physically, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Does it still make me uncomfortable from time to time? Of course. Do I let it wreck my life? Of course not.

You have to be proud of who you are and take ownership of that pride. Easier said than done, I know. You are more than just your voice, and if other people can't get passed it, then f*ck 'em.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008, 8:44 AM

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A high voice means you have a high amount of estrogen in your body. This is a very womanly quality that you should be proud of!

Tuesday, May 06, 2008, 1:14 PM

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I have a friend who has a rediculous southern twang combined with loud, high pitched voice - it comes off as VERY valley girl. People always make fun of her behind her back - including one of her so-called best friends - and it is sad because she is one of the nicest people i know.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008, 1:51 PM

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i think people should stop being so critical of others. i have a very low voice for a female due to my hashimoto's disease. so, when i drink any kind of alcohol (and i love my red wine) my voice gets even lower. people will some times say i sound like a guy. i just say at least i don't look like one.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008, 1:56 PM

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1:14 I believe OP said she has a very soft voice, not a high voice. And you should know what your talking about before giving advice.

Finding a good voice coach was an excellent idea, as well as going to specific acting classes. I think you could start even trying to change your voice yourself by speaking a bit louder to the people your most comfortable with. As with anything if you practice you will eventually retrain your voice but you have to practice speaking loudly. Personally I don't think there is anything wrong with a soft voice besides sometimes not being able to hear everything being said.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008, 2:38 PM

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