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Hi Star...I hope you don't mind, but I saw your post in the "What do you worry about" thread and had a question for you.

What kind of trouble is your son having in school? I ask because I had school problems at his age also and might be able to offer some insight if our problems are similar.


Wed. Mar 8, 7:39pm

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Thanks Bradley, I appreciate the concern. He mostly has issues with focus and paying attention. He can never really communicate to me whats going on - if I ask him a direct question about something very specific, he can't tell me the answer.

For example this week he brought home a homework sheet dated for last week. I asked why it wasn't completed and he said "I think it's the homework sheet for this week." But George, it has last week's date on it - why?" "I don't know." I gave him a chance to figure out what was going on - I told him to confront the teacher and get it straightened out - when he came home his explanation was vague and indirect. So I wrote a note to the teacher to get to the bottom of it.

He does not do his homework on his own - I have to stay on him to get it done, if I just let him alone it takes him hours to do work that should be done in minutes. He has always been that way.

He doesn't like to read and often cannot give me a clear synopsis of what he reads. If he comprehends the material, he can't express that. He thinks abstractly - for our lives at home, it's fine - but I'm worried of how he'll fit in socially.

He is very physical and would really just like to play outside all day. At home he is confident and loud and personable - at school he is shy and plays by himself a lot.

Communication, I guess is his biggest issue. In writing and speaking. The way he seems to put things together and describe them is abstract. He can't write complete sentences correctly. He is only in third grade, but he should be able to do better than what he does.

He just got done taking a state diagnostics test that if he did not pass will mean that he has to go through third grade again.

I have a meeting next week with some people from the school - they gave him some testing and had a pychologist evaluate him - they'll probably tell me that he has ADD. I'm not sure how I feel about that.

Anyway, sorry to go on and on. Thanks for seeking me out Bradley.


Wednesday, March 08, 2006, 7:59 PM

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I just want to add one comment. My friend has a son who is only in 1st grade and is having problems focusing. He doesn't get his homework done and often times seems like something is distracting him. The school asked her to have him seen by a dr for ADD. The doctor said they thought it was ADD but she was determined to do something other than medicine. She enrolled him in karate at the local YMCA. It has helped him to focus greatly. He looks forward to going each week and knows he has to keep doing well in school to be able to go. Just an idea, have you tried any activities to get him focused?

Wednesday, March 08, 2006, 9:56 PM

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Absolutely - we've had him in karate in the past, and are thinking about starting him in it again. We have also had him in soccer and football. There were times when all his teamates would be standing listening to the couch and somehow he would be off standing by himself not listening.

Thanks for the suggestion - we will probably try out the karate again. We only concentrate on one extracuricular activity at a time.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006, 11:18 PM

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Your son sounds a lot like my little brother at that age. This may surprise you, but he probably doesn't know how to read. My brother is dyslexic and has ADD. We didn't catch onto it until he failed his 3rd grade tests. He was promoted to 4th grade because he is a twin and it would be too emotionally damaging for him to be left back. They taught him to read via a special method (and now he is doing well in 11th grade). Boys often have problems early on that get resolved when middle school comes along. A note on the ADD medicine, my brother has since decided he hates the ADD medicine because it makes him more inhibited/anti social. He has gone off it without the consent of the doctor or my mother -- but he is 16 so it is time he makes his own decisions.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006, 11:24 PM

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Well, his problems aren't similar to what mine were, but he does sound like my little brother and like what other people mentioned. My little brother has ADD. I know that there are tons of stigmas associated w/it these days, but it's really nothing to be ashamed of. I would try what the others recommended about physical activities before medicine though. My brothers mother (he's a 1/2 brother) put him on ADD medicine (can't remember which one) and he was a completely different person. It made him SO out of it. He hated it.

I'm sorry to hear about the little guys problems. Everybody is so different and learns in so many different ways. Unfortunately, schools do not really accomodate the learning style of everyone. I truly hope that you guys find something to help him.

Take Care,


Oh...and I found the dyslexia/unable to read comment interesting. That's not something I would have thought of, but makes sense.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006, 11:47 PM

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