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update - is sex important in a relationship?

So for those who have been following my saga about my relationship, I talked to him last night.

We were having sex and it wasn't working at all I could tell that he was really trying hard. I tried hard to keep calm. He finally got up and started making jokes like usual and said that he was going to the bathroom to get a wet towel to "dampen me up down there" and that's when I lost it. He came back and noticed that I was upset and tearing up and suddenly got quiet and laid down next to me. I laid it all on the table then and told him exactly how I felt. He was still quiet. I told him how I need us to kiss more and how it hasn't been working for me lately. He suggested we look at each other and we turned our heads towards each other and then he started to cry. He is very sensitive. He explained how he was basically a virgin before he met me. He did have a relationship but it it wasn't long. He said how he is inexperienced and I need to tell him more about how I feel. We talkted for a while and he was really upset. He later said "jeez it sucks knowing I can't satisfy my girlfriend".
Since yesterday though we have grown much closer I can already tell. I think we are going to be more open toward each other too from now on. We haven't had sex yet but I imagine things are looking up! :D

Thanks for the ladies who put in the good words, you might hear from me in the future!

Mon. Mar 13, 8:12pm

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That's great news, SexGirl (for lack of anything better to call you). All he did was make a classic beginner's error of thinking that what works for one of us works for all of us. Your situation is certainly not hopeless. Good luck next time you get him nekkid :)


Monday, March 13, 2006, 8:52 PM

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Thank the lord.

Monday, March 13, 2006, 9:53 PM

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"Why not start with a Kiss? mmmm?"

"You don't have to go leaping straight for the clitoris like a bull at the gate! Give her a kiss, my boy!"

~Monte Python, Meaning of Life

Perhaps inappropriate, but I've always thought there was a lot of truth in it. Have you ever considered cutting out intercourse for a period and driving each other insane with foreplay? Like 2 teenagers with no place to go? It's rather fun ;-)

That's excellent that you two got some things out in the open! Keep communicating with him. Everything won't change overnight, so persistence and lots of practice! :D

Monday, March 13, 2006, 11:44 PM

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Good girl!!! I'm glad you finally talked. I'm sure he was feeling very insecure as well, and thought that by "lightening the moment" through laughter, he could get through.

I do have to say that 99% of a good sexual relationship is actually in the brain... once you've got the connection above, things will go better below! :-)

And, the last poster has very good advice-- sometimes just the foreplay can get you both excited and happy together! :-)

Tuesday, March 14, 2006, 1:43 AM

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You know that most women are not able to orgasm by just straight sex. Most need added stimulation of some kind, or some prefer to orgasm through oral sex, which I think you said he doesn't want to do for you. My husband doesn't do that either, but we adjust, and have found other ways, and that's ok. It's not for everyone and I don't believe in tit for tat, there really are other factors in the relationship that are more important to me than getting oral sex.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006, 5:17 AM

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Speaking of which,
the following video I found on MySpace is absolutely hilarious!!! :-)
Don't worry, it's safe for the kiddies...

Tuesday, March 14, 2006, 9:54 AM

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i have not followed your story but I am a firm believer that it is EXTREAMLY improtatn to be an open book with your partner on the topic of intamcy.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006, 4:56 PM

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How has it been going?

Saturday, March 25, 2006, 12:07 AM

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!! I followed this story too !!

how is it going

Saturday, March 25, 2006, 7:30 PM

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I have also been following this story , Girl you have it made now you can train him the way you want him don't be shy about it show him what you want and how you want it he will thank you and you will thank your self Good luck

Saturday, March 25, 2006, 8:50 PM

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