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Any advice on dealing with PTSD from Child abuse?

I'm 39 and dealing with PTSD from abuse. I always said child abuse, but recently realized she is still abusing me, and recently, verbally through my FB page as well as my little sister. I have deleted my mother from my FB...still not sure how I feel about this yet, but not my sister.Now my mother is trying to get my family to be mad at me too by saying hurtful and mean things about me online. I figure if I ignore it and don't acknowledge it, it will eventually stop and people will see the way she likes to be hurtful. Her family already knows what she can and is like, so they have very little to do with her as it is. Not sure why the sudden attach recently, but it was the last straw for me. I was trying to "deal with it" so my daughter could know her grandmother, but I figure I can just tell her how much her grandmother loved her and hope thats enough.

My Dr. wants me to go to a specialts that deals with PTSD from child abuse, but I don't want to relive the abuse....any advice? Or anyone who has done this and is now better for it?

Should I go to a specialist or can it be dealt with another way?


Mon. Jul 16, 2:58pm

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Go to the specialist.!!!
Get the best support you can find-- the abuse is never going to stop untill you make it stop... A specialist will help you learn the best way to express yourself, especially to family members. You need to acknowledge everything that has happened or is happening to you..AND you need to learn how to talk about it.....

Monday, July 16, 2012, 8:50 PM

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PTSD

hi OP, I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. It sounds like you are taking steps to manage your vulnerability. I have to agree with your doc to see a specialist. I am a child sexual abuse survivor and suffered PTSD as well. Through therapy and seeing specialists, I am now able to meaningfully engage in a healthy life, healthy relationship and have a healthy attitude towards my friendships and family. Most importantly, I feel I can be the parent I want to be to my son. It's hard work but I would not be alive today (with no exaggeration) if I hadn't sought the help. I wish you all the best as you make the decisions you need to take care of yourself and your family.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012, 12:42 AM

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Thanks for your comments. I definately don't know how to talk about and it is effecting my family life...I am often sad or angry and I know that it is because I have so much I'm trying to deal with, but just don't know how.

"Hi OP" - How long did it take you before you were able to fee like you could "meaningfully engage in a healthy life"? And how did you cope with having to relive the abuse?

Tuesday, July 17, 2012, 8:43 AM

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Hi OP. I am in the same boat with you. I had to cut off my mum though. I am emotionally safer without her. My father is dead. I don't speak to my sister because I don't talk to my mum and they are best chums. I have my husband and my own children and I know my childhood effects my adulthood. I am unable to love completely. There is a part of my heart that has been walled up and I have been unwilling or unable to to tear down those walls. I have tried therapy but haven't had any luck yet. Don't give up!

Sunday, July 22, 2012, 9:12 PM

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PTSD - response

Hi OP, it's me again. The healing process is individual as each person's experience is very unique (as well as our personalities). I struggled with multiple types of abuse (sexual, emotional, verbal) and also survived rape. The abuse began probably when I was 3 or 4yo until I was in my late teens. My family was not supportive and my mother also threatened to get a lawyer (against me) when I started the therapy when I was 19. Additionally depression and mental illness run strong in my mom's side of the family, so I had that complication as well. I entered therapy basically because one of my abusers began to stalk me. This was before there was a stalking law. But i had police protection at my college for this. Anyway, long long long story short, I was able to work through my issues with support from good therapists, good friends, and an understanding though clueless partner. It was a journey of peaks and valleys. I exited the valley after about 10 years, which was 10 years ago for me. The abuse is part of who I am because it shaped who I am. I have painful memories, especially now taht I have a child and see how vulnerable he is, but these memories are nothing close to the horrific flashbacks and fugues that I used to experience. It has been decades since I have night terrors, and I have wanted to live my life for at least a decade now. I cannot imagine my life without having gone through this journey. I can say that if I didn't go through my journey, I most likely would not be alive or I would at least be living half-dead. Let me know if you want to email more - I'm happy to help in any way that I can.

Take care .

Monday, July 23, 2012, 1:46 AM

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PTSD

I understand your reluctance to see the specialist. Reliving the trauma can be horrible....but also very benificial, healing and freeing. I went through this and I can tell you that some days when I left the Dr. office I felt as though I was hit by a mac truck. It was a good feeling though, having all out there and not holding it inside anymore. The sessions get easier to go to. I honestly feel as though my life changed for the better. I really hope you decide to see the specialist. Good luck to you

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