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Pressure to be thin in New York?
I moved to NYC about a year ago. Since then, I have noticed that I am much more aware of my own size but also of the people I see and meet. I am wondering if it is my own perspective and I am sliding down that slippery slope to becoming "one of those" women who is obsessed with weight or if there are others who feel like there is a lot of pressure to be skinny in NYC.
Sun. Jul 30, 2:36pm
While New York is the fashion capitol of the world as well as the center for business. I have been in and out for years and have friends there. I note that they are all heavier than I am and focus on food as NYC has either fabulous or terrible food, the only in-between so-so food is chain. I would suggest you look at your activities and friends as it appears to be more of a focus for you and not one that is being pressured since there is a fabulous restaurant on every corner and at least one in between. In fact, I have many folks who say they lose weight when they leave NYC because it is easier because there is not so much street food and fewer good restaurants.
Sunday, July 30, 2006, 4:26 PM
Just the opposite
I've lived in NYC for almost 20 years and I actually find it easier to be chubby here than elsewhere. I find New Yorkers care about how you think and express yourself - not having anything interesting to say is a terrible crime here - not having interesting to wear is not so relevant (unless you are in the fashion industry). It may also be worth noting that we walk a lot as most of us don't own cars (and even if we did, what would we do with them here in the City) - at least not in Manhattan and the more densely populated parts of Brooklyn and Queens. Going to shopping malls and food courts is also not so big here and fast food NYC style is much more likely to be sushi or a salad bar or fruit from a street vendor than McDonalds. So . . . (1) I do not feel pressure to be thin here; and (2) I think the lifestyle of a lot of NYC is just condusive to being a little bit thinner than much of suburban/exurban America.
Sunday, July 30, 2006, 10:23 PM
i don't know about NY but LA...
when i went to visit my friend whose a struggling actor... OMG, i never felt so fat or so un-tan.
Sunday, July 30, 2006, 10:30 PM
Agreed, its easier to be heavy in NYC than other places.
Not having anything to say is more of a crime in NYC than weight. Yes, some are thinner because they walk and take public transportation. But I also find that the people are heavier and there are less repercussions for it in NYC than other places because the restaurants are so fabulous and there is so much street food that is good, decent food.
Monday, July 31, 2006, 8:46 AM
thank you all for your very insightful comments. It actually really helps! I defintely agree that there are many wonderful restaurants on every corner (especially where I live!) which could lead to more chubbiness but also that people walk everywhere (as do I) - which could lead to people being skinnier. The thing I DO tend to notice is that neighborhood (and thus class) is a pretty big indicator of weight. Seems to me that EVERYONE on the Upper East Side is rail thin whereas people in Harlem or parts of Queens and Brooklyn that are not as wealthy tend to have heavier people. That is not a very novel obseravtion - it is pretty well established that there is a correlation between socio-economic status and health (and thus being fit/ lean). Anyhoo, maybe it is just the circles that I travel in (Ivy League alumni/ investment bankers, etc.)
I'd be interested in other people's thoughts. Thanks!
Monday, July 31, 2006, 8:50 AM
NYC shows my fat @ss love every time
I live in Boston and when I'm ready for an ego boost I get right on the Chinatown bus to NYC. Men of every flavor show me love in the big apple. They did when I was a size 22 and they still do now that I'm a size 12/14. But I should say that I'd rather go to the dentist and have my whole mouth drilled with no novocaine before I'd willingly spend a moment on the upper east side. Ick.
Monday, July 31, 2006, 10:06 AM
To the 8:50am poster:
It's not so much about class/neighborhood as it is about the preferences of the ethnic groups that live there. For example, Harlem is predominantly black and hispanic, and in those races most men prefer their women a little thick. Upper East Side - the nearer you are to Central Park, the more WASPy botox, anorexia, and miniature dogs you'll see walking the streets (further from the park, it gets way more normal).
Being a midtown-dwelling plain ol' white girl of obvious celtic ancestry packing an extra 40 or so pounds, I get overlooked pretty completely in social situations. It's slightly better now that I'm not 80 or 100 lbs overweight, but I'm still to self-conscious to enjoy myself at a bar.
Monday, July 31, 2006, 12:05 PM
Check out the Overheard in New York link below about how they do it!
Monday, July 31, 2006, 12:26 PM
It's the folks you are hanging around with ... Maybe not so good!
It's the folks you are hanging around with .. Maybe you are trying to impress them and think this is the way to do it. I went to an Ivy league, have lived and traveled and worked all over the world.
You can choose who you hang around with.
I have had an apartment on the Upper East Side ... and I know for a fact that they are all not rail thin and DEFINITELY are not consumed with working out. I have friends who live in two apartment building with famous actors and business people as well as a princess, and a couple of lords from England. Not only are none of them fat/ or too skinny, but that is NOT the topic that impresses them. Frankly, in one conversation they dislike people who believe that looks are the only thing. In fact, etiquette, grace, proper walking, not chewing gum, and having an interesting non-political topic to talk about such as the last book you read is much more important!
I'd check out who you are hanging around with and why.
Monday, July 31, 2006, 3:50 PM
It is not the folks you're hanging out with. The people of NYC are a beautiful brood and yes, there is enormous pressure to be stick thin here. Did anyone see the devil wears prada? It is for real. The highest compliment you can get is "you look thin". not beautiful, not sexy, but "you look thin.
OP, remember that the men that you will like will like you, not a stick thin figure.
Monday, July 31, 2006, 3:53 PM
Quote from a chubby girl from Ohio I had just met:
"I love New York. Whatever you are, there are at least ten thousand guys who are into that."
Wednesday, August 16, 2006, 9:45 AM
The Pressure is EVERYWHERE.
One word: media.
I'm in Missouri... The media hypes the "perfect body" stuff... I totally feel the pressure.... I'm only 16 and have an obsession with all of this.. It's unhealthy, yes.. I'd love to have someone to talk to about this. If any of you feel compelled you may email me: firstname.lastname@example.org. I figure I get so much spam as it is, I might as well give that address out, lol.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006, 7:33 PM
pressure is on for singles and clubgoers
i definitely know for a fact that if you are into the trendy club/bar/lounge scene, there is a lot of pressure to be thin. i found it very unusual to see anyone with even a little bit of weight on them at these places. i dont even go out anymore to any of the old places i used to go before i got this fat. my girlfriend works the door at many of the hot spots in NYC and has been given instructions from the owners of certain clubs to not let fat girls into the club. i also think that the pressure is greater for the single girls who are trying to find a man.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006, 10:32 PM
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