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Dealing with coworkers you dislike
So I absolutely don't like...can't get myself to like one of my teammates and i am on this project through december...i don't respect her and i am afraid it shows...how do i deal with it? I don't want to make her angry because it will effect my year end rating and we have a small team so i don't want any conflict from my side
she just makes it a point to show me that she is ranked higher than me. For instance, she'll make it a point to tell me that i have to do the petty work like taking notes coz she doesn't want to. She wants me to spoon feed her all the time? Help! Plus, she's so self-centered but incredibly sweet spoken in front of the managers so no one thinks that she's being degrading to me.
Mon. Oct 9, 1:47pm
i say slather on the sugar...when she says something like, "you take notes coz i don't want to," reply with something like, "yeah, i know it can be hard to pay attention to details, but i'm really good at it." or, "yeah, i understand, the notes are important and we wouldn't want any mistakes." part of being on a team is learning how to best present all of your strong points, so dealing with a b**ch might be something to add to your resume when this project is over, lol !
Monday, October 09, 2006, 1:54 PM
This is great advice. (last poster). Thanks, not the OP, but I'm going to use this approach.
Monday, October 09, 2006, 2:01 PM
I agree with the "kill them with kindness" option...it really works. I use it all the time. Also, be sure to think of this as a learning experience and how not to act when you are a supervisor! Now, if she totally crosses the line, then you have every right to cal l her on it, but privately and with class....
Monday, October 09, 2006, 2:08 PM
Keep taking the high road - it will be noticed. You may think her behavior isn't recognized, but I would not be so sure. Rise above it and be true to your self. Stay professional and try to keep it about the job and not take it personally. I know it's easier said than done, but after this is long gone and over you will look back on it as a time when you had to deal with someone petty and were able to make progress in spite of it. One thing to try is what others have suggested - give her credit where it's due (preferably in front of others at a meeting) because she's obviously insecure and hungry for attention - it costs you nothing and might help smooth things over. Don't be too obvious about it and personally I wouldn't sugar-coat it too much, if you can't sincerely find one or two good things she's done then it's better to stay quiet. However, it won't hurt and makes you look good because you come off as being secure enough in your own accomplishments that you don't need the spotlight. If she's gracious about it, then try to work out some sort of professional relationship, but if she's a snot about it, then deal with her when you have to, keep it strictly to details about various tasks and avoid her because there is nothing to be gained from doing anything else.
Above all remember it is just a job, this is not your whole life, so try to keep her 'at work' and don't let her ruin your leisure time. Good luck!
Monday, October 09, 2006, 2:34 PM
Thanks this really helps..i am saving it so i can read it every day and may be twice when need be
Monday, October 09, 2006, 3:27 PM
1:54 gave such great advice! If you can do it that would be great. If your anything like me, I would consider it great if I could just keep my mouth shut. Also try and find somebody you can trust and share with. Some times( now I am a littkle crazy it helps me if i just shake my shoulder a little to shake it off! Good Luck !
Monday, October 09, 2006, 4:02 PM
Read these books
And then come back and see if you don't have a different take on it.
"Hardball for women"
"Nice girls don't get the corner office"
Tuesday, October 10, 2006, 4:19 AM
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