Declining a dinner invitation

Does anyone else ever have to deal with being invited to dinner knowing it will be a high fat, high calorie, unhealthy meal? I just declined an invitation from my inlaws today because I've been working so hard at losing weight and eating healthy and I could not get myself to go eat at their house. Of course, I didn't tell them that was why I couldn't go. It was on somewhat of a short notice too so I didn't really have the option of taking something.

Sun. Oct 2, 8:56pm

Er--

I'm terrible, one group of friendsdoes wine and cheese nights... I stop at TJ's and with the bottle of wine I buy a single salad in case I get hungry. We're all varying degrees of nuts so it passes. With the in laws, offer to bring a salad to go with the meal? If you pack the dressing separate it should last in the car?

You can pass it off as "I just had to try this recipe for cold beef and carmelized onions and bleu cheese salad. Isn't it divine?"

amanda911

Monday, October 03, 2005, 1:14 AM

I have this problem often!

I always find myself psyching myself up to just eat the vegetables or the fish and I end up eating a whole loaf of french bread which is incredibly frustrating. So I have, in recent months, become a lot more anti-social. It doesn't seem like a good thing, but I figure I'll be able to manage it better when I've met some of my target weght.

Monday, October 03, 2005, 11:07 AM

MY solution..

My mother in law is Itilian, so you guessed it- high carb city!
So, when I do eat there, i usually have a small amount of a little bit of everything i like..making it seem like im eating alot, when im actually eating a normal size portion. Desserts are hard to do that with buy i try my best....I also try to get my hubby to take a quick walk once we get home or even around there neighborhood to burn off a little of the dessert.
So far, its my best option, since she practailly SHOVED food down my throat as soon as i get there AND is sure to make my favorite desserts, like pudding pie! Damn her and her great cooking and wonderful intentions! LOL
Best of luck in social situations:) Dont beat yourself up, just try not to overindulge- and if you happen to eat too much "bad food", just do extra in the gym next time your there :)
Good luck!

Monday, October 03, 2005, 11:51 AM

If there is salad or veggies or something low-cal, the best option I've found is to fill your plate with that, and eat it all before you're "allowed" to fill your plate with other stuff. At that point, you're way less hungry, so only the things you really really want will seem as appealing, and some of the things that would've been great fresh out of the oven are a little cold and less appealing, like garlic bread or cheese-covered dishes. If your mother-in-law wants to fill your plate right away, make sure you grab the plate first and put a very large helping of salad, etc., on it right away so there's less room for the other stuff.

Monday, October 03, 2005, 12:20 PM

Unfortunately, she's a good old, down home, stick to your ribs kind of cook. When she says she has veggies, she means green beans with bacon and bacon grease. And it's not like I don't like to eat this food on occasion, I don't deny it tastes good, but there are just some times when you have to say that this is not the day for it. I like to pick my indulgences and a roast sitting in grease w/potatoes, gravy and green beans w/bacon just was not my choice for an indulgence. Stick a brownie in front of me with a scoop of ice cream and we'll talk. :)

Monday, October 03, 2005, 1:59 PM

Decling a dinner invitation

Maybe you were right to do it now. But start going to those invited dinners. Great to go and enjoy company and think about your food in (what I would hope is a supportive atmosphere) Dont say the D word and give them fuel for conversation if somone should comment on your food just a smile and I'm good with this thank you. No need to hear from the choir or to preach. food is personal for everyone.

Monday, October 03, 2005, 3:27 PM

It is funny that with all these comments not one really addresses the real issue. There is nothing wrong with saying I am trying to eat healthier and asking if you could bring something with you. After family above all else should be supportive. My in-laws eat really badly so I one day pulled my mother in law aside and told her that I was really trying hard to lose weight and it was hard for me to come over for dinner so often because although she is a fab cook most of the stuff she makes I couldn't afford to eat. She totally understood and said she thought it was a good idea to eat healthier. Since then she makes healthier stuff and she leaves sauces on the side so everyone can enjoy them or not use them. She wasn't in the least offended and is totally supportive.
You could try just being honest and talk to them.

Monday, October 03, 2005, 6:31 PM

I ate with them last month and politely ate what was offered. It was the exact same meal that was being offered the other day. And while they know that I'm trying to be healthier and that their son had surgery to lose weight, it doesn't mean they will change what they eat. While they are verbally supportive, they are not physically supportive. My FIL is borderline diabetic. He probably needs a little preaching to even though we don't do it. I guess I should make it clear that it's not only about food. A previous poster wrote, "great to go and enjoy the company"... well, it's not always enjoyable there. It probably goes a litte deeper than unhealthy food. I just wondered if others experienced the same situation.

Monday, October 03, 2005, 6:51 PM

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