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My husbands 55 and never in the mood?

He says it is because he is old and tired. What can I do? any homeopathic recommendations

Wed. Jan 3, 8:06pm

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Is he in good health otherwise? How is the rest of his life? Does he like his job? Is he perhaps suffering from mild depression? Does he have any chronic ailments that might be making it hard for him to enjoy activity? How active is he otherwise? How is his social life? Sexual health can be an indicator of many issues (medical or emotional) and it might be a good idea for him to have a thorough physical.

Honestly I found it very hard to be in the mood when I was larger because I was tired and in pain a lot. Since I have lost weight, gotten a new (much better) job and been working out - my libido has really improved.

Best wishes to him and you!

Wednesday, January 03, 2007, 8:17 PM

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my boyfriend is young (28) and we have a great relationship-and he often complains of being too tired (or stressed) for sex. this sounds crazy to me-since i find sex to be a great stress reliever-however his work puts incredible stress on him and he often can't shut off from work before bedtime early enough to relax and get in the mood. i spent a long time feeling crappy about us-thinking his minimal interest in sex was me-but now i see a pattern with his work schedule/deadlines/sleep and his interest. if your husband is healthy, perhaps he has stress/exhaustion from work that is getting in the way of his desire?

also, testosterone levels do decrease as men age, and sometimes the libido goes with it. this may be a little much-but perhaps you could talk to him about one of the many medications on the market now to "spark" his interest again"?

good luck!! i hope it gets better for you!!!

Thursday, January 04, 2007, 2:17 AM

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I will trade you husbands LOL I am 30 and never in the mood just to tired and wore out with work school kids and everything. My husband is 30 and ALWAYS in the mood.

Thursday, January 04, 2007, 8:02 PM

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OP, why does your husband think it's okay to be 55, "old and tired."
And why does he think it should be okay with you if he's never in the mood? I (unfortunately) have met all too many 50-something guys who claim that because their wives are not in the mood I am just the (younger) woman they deserve. Yech.

Thursday, January 04, 2007, 8:46 PM

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Thanks everyone for your support! My husband doesn't think it is OK that we have such different desires. But we will work it out! My best friend is 54. She is never in the mood either. She really loves her husband. She is still attracted to him but she just lost her sex drive. We always wish that God would switch our sex drives. Oh Well It is not happening. Who knows! I know marriage and partnership is more important then sex. But it is important. We will get ourselves together. Thanks again

Thursday, January 04, 2007, 9:54 PM

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I know too well what you're going through except the situation is reversed with me. You see, I'm the one that's never in the mood. I just had a baby 5 months ago and my lost of desire started when I was 6 months pregnant. Obviously I gained weight (31llbs to be exact) and after my baby girl was born it went downhill from there. I had no drive, no desire, I didn't want anything to do with sex. It made it worse that I was still quite large for my frame (I'm 5'4") and I refused to let my husband see me without clothes or in underware for that matter. I started working out to lose my pregnancy weight which I have accomplished. Since giving birth I've lost all my pregnancy weight and I actually weigh less than when I got pregnant with my daughter. I went to see my doctor and told him my lack of desire & drive and after answering a few questions he advised me to get a lubricant to get me in the mood.

Although things are much better than what they were I'm still not at the point that I used to be but I know how frustrating it is not only for my husband (god bless his soul he never complains) but for myself as well. I would try different things, maybe watch a movie, or lingerie, stuff like this. See if it gets him going.

I wish you luck.

Friday, January 05, 2007, 8:03 AM

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I tried using a lubricant.It was horrible! It took away my pleasure!

Friday, January 05, 2007, 6:15 PM

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Dear OP,

I agree with Rosa. Make sure you talk it out together and then try some new things: showers together, lingerie, having sex in the am after everyone is rested, movies, etc.

There are sex therapists that can help too. Good luck!

Saturday, January 06, 2007, 1:00 AM

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Hubby may think he's too old!

Has he tried ginseng sold in almost any vitamin area like wal mt.
Or Stamina RX--It's a blue pill. You can buy in packs of 2 or more at convenience store, or you can purchase them at some wal mt stores in pharmaceutical or vitamin area. I does work.

Saturday, January 06, 2007, 12:16 PM

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