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What Makes You a GOOD Wife or Husband?

Or any other type of significant other?

I'm newly married and would like to hear from others on what they think makes them a good spouse.

What makes me a good wife is that I'm supportive, understanding, and forgiving to name a few off the top of my head.

I would like to be more loving and passionate, I wasn't brought up to be overly affectionate and we've both been so busy, the passion in our relationship is a little lower than normal.

Fri. Feb 16, 5:10pm

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I give good he@d!

Friday, February 16, 2007, 7:12 PM

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If you love yourself, you can love others.

Have your own life and interests

Really look someone in the eye when talking and don't websurf or text or any other distracting behaviors when talking.

Friday, February 16, 2007, 9:37 PM

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I listen.

Friday, February 16, 2007, 11:28 PM

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I praise him.
I complement him.
I listen to him. (and he really likes to talk!) =)
I'm supportive.
And he treats me just as well.

We both learned a LOT from past relationships/marriage and are applying it to this marriage. Never forget why you fell in love with him and what makes you feel grateful about this marriage. (and yes, more sex does help!)

Congratulations on your marriage and good luck to you both.

Saturday, February 17, 2007, 12:07 AM

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Congrats on your nuptials. Thereis a column in this month's Oprah by Lisa Kagen. She says anyone can throw rose petals on a brass bed but someone who really loves you will hold your hair while you're vomiting into the toilet. My husband recently proved that to me.

Saturday, February 17, 2007, 8:38 AM

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Letting him sleep in when I just want to leave the house.
Seeing him as the greatest human ever made.
Celebrating his success and getting him through failures.
Being honest with him no matter what.
Trusting him with no question.

Saturday, February 17, 2007, 9:34 PM

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I'm also newly wed, so this is in interesting thread, thanks OP.

I try to remember that men are very sexual beings... so even though my libido doesn't match his, I try to make sure that he knows I'm attracted to him, even if I'm not up for sex that day.

I listen to him, and gently point out areas he needs to work on. By that I mean, letting go of anger/bitterness/resentment about his previous marriage... accepting where he is in his life now... that sort of thing.

I am very affectionate, something that doesn't come naturally for me. I believe hat physical contact is something we don't get enough of these days, and although it's alien to me, I know he appreciates it when I cuddle him, or simply hold his hand.

In return, he treats me like gold :-)

Sunday, February 18, 2007, 3:37 PM

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8yrs married and counting

notice and compliment the things they do DO- not the things they don't.

Messy dressers and the jobs they have neglegted to help with don't matter in the long run- don't hold onto the grudge -get pissed and let go before they come home.

Don't rehash every old fight with each new discussion or difference of opinion.

make sure you act like someone you would WANT to come home to...

Sunday, February 18, 2007, 5:09 PM

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Listean and try not to judge. Always trust until given a reason not to .

Sunday, February 18, 2007, 10:14 PM

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From someone who was married 25 years through good times and bad times we were poor we were rich we were healthy we were sick we raised 4 kids
Marriage ia about commitment and sacrafice. My husband loves me uncodotionally. Oh yeah I wiegh or wieghed (lost some) 80 ibs more. I love him unconditionally. That doesn't mean we don't fight or disagree. We just accept each other and let go. Oh yeah our sex life has been good sometimes and lacking others. Marriage is such a gift and so worth the sacrafice. It is great! Good Luck

Monday, February 19, 2007, 12:33 AM

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When you are in the wrong, admit it gracefully. Don't be afraid of change and growth, embrace it. Be affectionate in all ways and treat your spouse BETTER than you treat the people you work with. Make spending time together alone a priority, especially if you have children.

Monday, February 19, 2007, 1:50 PM

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married 4 years, together almost 8

1. Don't ever go to sleep angry
2. Spend lots of time together - my dh and I are always together.
3. Share - everything. We share chores, errands, time, even baby diapers
4. Live by the golden rule - Do unto others
5. Don't forget to take time to enjoy each other - date night, do special things.

When I was a teenager, my mother gave me a book called "The RULES." Unfortunately, I laughed when I read the book, thinking that no man who was really a man would put up with a woman who actually followed the rules. I showed the book to my husband and we totally agree that the rules are a good basis and one of the reasons we have such a good relationship.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007, 7:05 AM

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Simply being nice goes a long way.

Saturday, February 12, 2011, 4:35 PM

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I always have my spouse's back, I see the best in them and I'm as nice and attentive now, 22 years and three kids later, as I was back when we first met! And I make sure to take care of myself, which also makes me a better spouse. :)

Saturday, February 12, 2011, 5:15 PM

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