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I need major help

Hi. I need any sort of advice anyone can give me. I'm really struggling with staying consistent with diet. Well, it's not a diet for me; it's a lifestyle change that I am trying to stay on. I'm not depriving myself, rather sticking to 1800-2000 calories for right now. The problem is that I can't seem to stay on it. After a few weeks I just get off it. Nothing seems to motivate me to really do something. Not fat pictures of myself, not the fact that I look awful in my clothes, not that I hate feeling and looking this way...nothing! I feel like my life revolves around food. I've always been a big eater, an emotional eater. I don't know what to do. Whenever I control my eating, I'm constantly thinking about food. Also, I only have about 20 pounds to lose. I mean I've seen people on this site who have lost a tremendous amount of weight, and I can't seem to lose 10!

Thanks for any advice.

Mon. Jul 23, 8:47pm

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My biggest piece of advice is to focus on the positives. Whenever you listed things that you have that don't motivate you, they are all negatives. Instead of using the fact that you look awful in your clothes, why not focus on how much healthier you'll feel. Or how much further you'll be able to run or how much more energy you'll have. Or, if you're motivated by clothes, go pick out an outfit that you'd love to go out in and work towards looking great in it. Some positive goal should help you stick to your plan. Best of luck to you!

Monday, July 23, 2007, 8:55 PM

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My advice would be: try 'being good' for 21 days. That's when the habit forms. Just tell yourself, it's only 21 days when I won't eat x, y, z. And keep through it. Then, maybe on the 22nd morning you'll wake up and won't really want those x, y, z anymore that much. I don't know, just try.

Monday, July 23, 2007, 9:01 PM

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I need major help

instead of feeling deprived and out of control, try rewarding yourself for success. Start with short times and give yourself something special to eat as a reward for being good.

For example: If i stay under 1800 calories today, I can have this 100 calorie thing i want for an evening snack. This still keeps you in your goal range. Or maybe: If i meet all my goals for this week, I can have one meal on sunday with no counting or worrying.

Small goals like this with food rewards help you feel like you are successful and also stave off the feeling that you are missing something you want.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007, 1:25 AM

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I don't really have any advice for you. I just think it is good that you keep trying. I am sure there is someone here who knows what to say.

I don't know what else to say. I am just relieved to hear there is someone else out there who needs to lose 20 pounds and finds it difficult.

Another emotional eater.


Tuesday, July 24, 2007, 1:33 AM

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maybe if you try logging not just what you're eating on pt but the time, how you were feeling at that time, how hungry you were at that time and come back and log how you felt after you ate.

be very honest with yourself and do this for a few weeks, whether or not you're eating healthily or not and maybe then you'll start to see a pattern. once you can see what that pattern is then you can start to identify what needs to change and start to have a healthier relationship with food.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007, 6:38 AM

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Lots of wisdom here...that's what I love about doing this. We all help each other.

Eating is experience with big sensory rewards. Have you looked at this?

You can make the most of this by making at least one meal a day (or more) preparing you food carefully, putting it on a pretty plate and eating either with loved ones or quietly alone as a kind of meditation. Can be as simple as an apple sliced and dusted with cinnamon that you enjoy slowly and quietly (if your life is hyped up all the time and you don't get any peace)...or a cup of high quality coffee or tea you buy at a favorite shop if you spend too much time solo.

Also you can enrich your whole life on a sensory level...favorite soaps, favorite colors, a new top so soft and pretty you love to wear it.

I would suggest stepping into your present life and really appreciate what lies around you. Buy an outfit you love NOW and wear it. Get a good haircut or have your nails done in a fun new color.

Simple pleasures...they add up and may help substitute for emotional eating and ultimately make your life richer so staying on target is something you can do with more ease.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007, 9:41 AM

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not the OP, but -great advice, 9:41...

Tuesday, July 24, 2007, 10:22 PM

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OP here

Thanks so much for all of your input! It means a lot that people care.

I think the biggest issue going on for me that I've realized over the last few years is that I have a void that I fill with food. I think maybe it's loneliness from lack of true friendships over the years. Food is always the thing that I look forward to everday. Perhaps if I can find something else that'll fill that hole it'll help. By the way, I was the one who wrote the "Advice on Friendship" thread. I also think that if by losing the weight (the cardio and weight training is consistent for me), I'll have something to look forward to-- confidence, confidence to be able to meet new people, be able to go shopping again instead of looking for clothes that hide my body lol, etc etc.

Thanks so much for your help!!!

Thursday, July 26, 2007, 2:14 AM

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I do not believe with a 1800-2000 calorie intake per day that you will lose weight. Thought it was to be around 1200 and at the most 1500 to lose weight.

Thursday, July 26, 2007, 9:23 AM

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above poster - maybe if her normal intake is 3000 a day and she goes down to 1800, she will?

How crazy do you have to be to not be able to eat less than 2000 calories a day? And she needs help with that ?? HA!

Thursday, July 26, 2007, 11:13 AM

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