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Are women grossed out by cross dressers?
Just a question?
Wed. Sep 12, 11:06pm
I guess it would depend on the woman. When I used to work in the clothing world I use to have a man come to me every few month and help him pick out womens outfits. It was so much damn fun and he was so cool. A lot of other girls thought it was weird and called him a freak but it didn't bother me in the least. I don't think he was gay, he certainly didn't stike me that way, he said he enjoyed dressing in womens clothes and the fabrics were nicer. I always enjoyed it when he came in. After a year I found myself looking forward to his visits.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007, 11:20 PM
You sounds soooo supportive - nice to hear that there are people like you out there!
Wednesday, September 12, 2007, 11:49 PM
no - i admire the courage
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 1:38 AM
It really doesn't phase me either way, people can dress as they please.
Just out of curiosity are you talking about men crossdressing as women or vice versa?
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 2:07 AM
Firstly - I don't think that it is courage to cross dress. It is like an itch for some that they just need to scratch - nothing sinister about it - so thank you for supporting those that do.
To the second response - women can wear mens clothes and in this day and age no-one batters an eye - but if a man wears a womens - he's sick - go figure that one out!!
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 2:21 AM
I have close friends - a couple, and the male is a cross dresser. Strinctly on Saturday nights, at "fetish" parties. Otherwise, he is a "regular sport watching dude"
He was very afraid to tell her when they started dating, but she embraced it! And they have a ball!
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 9:18 AM
The reason he's "sick" is coz he not only wears womens' clothes, but he wears make-up, wigs, etc. it's not "just a clothes issue" for the vast majority of cross dressers. I am grossed out by cross dressers - men should look like men and women should look like women.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 9:18 AM
I am TOTALLY DISGUSTED by it.
Maybe that's because my ex-husband told me on our honeymoon that he's a cross-dresser, and then he had the stones to call me "abnormal" for not wanting to have his babies. He's now married to a woman who likes putting make-up on him and they have two babies.
In recent years, I've discovered it's a manifestation of a submissive personality (because we're still considered the weaker/submissive sex) - go to a good dominatrix/dungeon site and you will see "feminization" on the menu.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 10:11 AM
9:18 So what about transgenders? Its people like you with your narrow little mind and the bubble of fear you live in that causes the problems with other people being able to feel safe and comfortable showing who they are, whether they are born male or female.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 10:17 AM
I love cross dressers!
I love cross dressers! I think they are great fun and I like the "over the top" quality that many go for. One of my neighbors was a cross dressing performer and I loved seeing him in drag because he went all out.....make-up, wigs, and sparkly outfits.
I love gender benders...they give life a human quality and make you rethink the ridiculous "rules" about what is male and what is female. I mean really...all of that is costume when you think about what people have worn over the centuries. What about all those kilts and togas...and the wigs people in parliment wear? Our first several presidents wore wigs....it's all "drag" to me.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 10:21 AM
Cross Dressers don't gross me out - BUT - your ex should not have waited until your honeymoon! That is terrible, what a jerk.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 10:26 AM
not grossed out at all, crossdressing to me is like dressing up of any kind, no one thinks it's gross if I decide to throw a costume party, like any kind of costume cross dressing is just pretending to be something you're not for a little while, no harm in it at all.
crossdressing is intirely different from being transgender, transgender people feel that they have been born with the wrong body, they are mentally a different gender from the one they are born (this does not have to do with sexual orientation, many transgender people are straight, and few gay people are transgender) if trangender people choose to dress as the gender they feel they are they can sometimes be confused for crossdressers, many transgender people take hormones or have surgery in which case they look just like any of the rest of us, you might be surprised how many people you see everyday that are transgender. I have several friends who are, and it certianly does not gross me out in the least. gender disphoria is even less understood by our society than sexual orientation, and transgender people have a far higher rate of depression than most people. they are also one of the groups with the highest percentage who face hate crimes, are beaten or killed for a condition they have no control over, so be nice!
each year there is a national transgender day of remembrance (this years is on november 19th) to honour those who have been killed for being transgender. for more information see:
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 10:35 AM
I pose no threat to cross dresser OR transgenders', I was simply giving my opinion what was ASKED FOR thank you very much.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 12:38 PM
Oh, just ignore 10:17. His/her ignorance and random argumentativeness are unmistakeable.
Cross-dresser = straight
Transvestite = gay
Transgender = "wrong body", some overlap with transvestites but NOT cross-dressers.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 1:35 PM
The variation on human behaviour is as wide as the Pacific Ocean. Why do people do stuff - with out any major medical/metal/rational reason - BECAUSE!
Why do I cross dress - is it because I am believing that women are submissive - no way. I treat my wife like a Queen, she is the love of my life and I see her as an equal.
Do I do it for sexual reasons - no
I do it cause there is something in me that likes it. I am not gay - not attracted to men in any way - I love women - I admire them - their look, clothes, attitude everything.
I do not want to be one. I love being a man but sometimes like expressing myself as a women.
Dont mean to offend anyone - just enjoying life.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 7:33 PM
I don't care if other people cross dress but I wouldn't date/marry a man who cross dresses. I find it a sexual turn off and I prefer my masculine husband over feminized men.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 7:59 PM
you would never pick me as a cross dresser if you met me - I am a man's man with a women side that only special people get to see.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 9:14 PM
to all of you self-righteous freaks that are trying to embrace cross-dressing, ummmm.....get a clue.
It's disgousting, the men don't look like women no matter how hard they try, they never pass for a woman. They think that by putting on heels and makeup and cheap wigs, they look feminie? That is NOT femininity! Women are not their make-up and their skirts! The things that make women feminine are ever copied by these men, they just choose to copy the stereotypical and end up looking hideous. It's absolutely appaling, especially when the crossdresser has a pot-belly, stubble, and a disgoustingly cheap wig with granny clothes. They don't even try to look good. Crossdressers are an insult to me as a woman.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 9:31 PM
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 9:44 PM
Im sorry you feel that way - but then again I think there are some girls that also let you down!
What about those girls that prance around half naked at sporting events - are they doing womens rights any good?
Or those that wear moomoo's - and dont take care of themselves?
At least I try!
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 9:44 PM
People like 9:31 gross me out...cross dressing? Who cares? Granted, I don't want my husband revealing this on our wedding night! But I don't want him revealing he's been keeping his IBS a secret either (happened to a friend of mine...and they don't go out anymore for fear of an 'episode'...) I guess it's more the honeymoon revelation that I've got issue with - not the issue!
Anyhoo, grossed out? No. Curious? Sure.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 10:15 PM
Curious - ask away, Im an open book!
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 10:21 PM
Grossed out isn't the right word. Saddened maybe.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 10:26 PM
Why are you saddened?
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 10:56 PM
9:31 you are insulted as a woman because of someone else's business? Please! It's not hurting you in any way! I'm insulted that YOU are a woman for being so shallow and closed minded.
Thursday, September 13, 2007, 11:44 PM
1:35 It seems you are the ignorant one. Not all cross dressers are straight. And I don't think that 10:17 was implying that. I think his/her point was that people like who they were commenting about live in fear of what they don't know or understand.
Friday, September 14, 2007, 12:15 AM
From the idiot who was tricked into marriage to a crossdresser...
Oh for god's sake, 9:31 is right on more levels than I can count - even in her feelings of being insulted. Have you ever noticed how trannies, cross-dressers and TVs always dress up like a MAN's concept of what a woman should look like (which is why the jury in my head is still out on the validity of transgenderism)? The grannie looking ones only dress like that because their bodies don't fit into anything else!
For the record, my ex was delighted when I put on 35 lbs - it made me a size 14, so he could wear everything in my wardrobe. I guess it's no wonder why I put the weight on. When I packed up to move out, he looked so disconsolate at the loss of his girl clothes that I left his favorites behind and just tacked it on the divorce settlement.
I also don't believe it's non-sexual, no matter what the "open book" crossdresser on this thread says. If it were just a matter of feeling free, if it really was just a mental trick, you could empower some silly hat to have that effect. If it weren't submission, then feminization (dressing someone up as a girl and putting make up on them) wouldn't be a service offered by DOMINATRIXES. Yup, I've met a few of those too - gotta love strangers on flights to Vegas. And I also know you guys have to do all kinds of mental gymnastics to justify your fetish, so swearing blind that it's not sexual doesn't convince anyone but you and your alternatively-wired brain.
Shallow? Close-minded? I'll take that over being so open-minded that my brain has fallen out, allowing me to think this might be acceptable, normal male behavior. Go get some first-hand experience of living with this kind of deviance and get back to us. I'm at the point where I see men in their stupid "girl" get-ups as pathetic, attention-seeking clowns.
Friday, September 14, 2007, 12:19 AM
Man that hurts!
I can tell you that I dont do it for sexual gratification - even though you dont believe me.
There are lots of people that do stuff via services as you explained - but like anything that is only one part of the bigger picture.
What do I do when dressed as a hetro-sexual cd, read, watch tv, walk outside on our property.
One of the most freeing afternoons I have ever had was when my wife set me up with a professional make-up artist who gave me the complete make-over. I then was allowed to sit outside on her veranda and chat about everyting and nothing - it was soooooo cool - nothing sexual about it.
Now I cant speak for all cd's, but for me it is just as rewarding and stress relieving as the 6 mile run that I did this morning. I get a simliar energy release and it is just somehting I do occassionally. So dont tarnish us all with the smae brush!
Friday, September 14, 2007, 1:37 AM
Everyone deserves the chance to be who they are inside. If this means cross dressing than so be it.
Friday, September 14, 2007, 7:45 AM
Clearly you've never been to the French Quarter in New Orleans.... those cross dressers look more like women than many women I know.
Friday, September 14, 2007, 8:50 AM
Your statement couldn't be more untrue. As a society we must fight improper urges. When we don't we end up with the Virginia Tech guy who was only living out "what he felt inside". And don't get me started on Columbine...did these boys have the right to live out what they felt inside??? C'mon!!! (and yes, I am comparing the two, urges, are urges and they affect society) I no more want to see my cross dressing neighbor walking around "on his property" in his dress and high heels than do I want to see my child come home from school early coz someone had a gun.
Friday, September 14, 2007, 9:01 AM
I have absolutley no problem with cross-dressing, but I do agree with some of the above posters, sometimes they do not look like what we as women would want to look like. caked on make up, huge boobs, trashy, glittery...its a little insulting that any person's concept of how to look like a woman would be THAT! If any of my girlfriends dressed like that on a night out, I would make them reconsider!
But I do have a friend who is a cross dresser and he dresses very chic, they way a regular cosmopolitan woman would want to dress. I guess funky cross dressers do exist.
Friday, September 14, 2007, 4:31 PM
9:01...where to start??? Being your authentic self and having a mental illness (VTech) are not one and the same. And plotting against others in response to years of bullying and being on the fringe is not the same as a guy who likes to wear dresses!
How in the heck does a very small minority of people who wear clothes that their gender doesn't normally wear (in this country) have any impact on this world whatsoever!??? What? You may have to teach your child about how people are different and don't always conform to what is 'normal'? Gee, maybe if kids heard this message a little more often we wouldn't have kids going postal on everyone at schools for being picked on.
I have a feeling this thread is going to spiral out of control...
Friday, September 14, 2007, 5:53 PM
LIke it or not, being your "authentic self" is who you are at birth. Fighting against "nature" only makes for suicidal , confused, people who spend their lives trying to be something they're not.
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 8:22 AM
Wow, is Dr. Phil using this site??
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 10:44 AM
Doesn't bug me one bit. I'm a woman who cross-dresses as a man. Of course, that's something people don't notice in the US until one goes to dress up! My bf thinks it's amusing & lends me his shirts.
It's not "living out an urge" like the urge to kill someone, for goodness' sake. It's just living the way I am most comfortable.
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 11:53 AM
Waht an interesting conversation!
When you think about it - it isn't natural for us to wear clothing to begin with. So, mankind realizes that we have practical needs to cover up parts of our bodies and to keep warm, etc. Good. So, initially - everyone wore skirts - didn't they? Pants were developed because some people who were mostly men, did some things that made it practical. Then customs develop that women wore clothes that flattered their figures ... but i f women were in charge would custom have gone the other way - would men's clothes be more revealing? Anyway ....get it? it's a silly argument. Cross-dressing doesn't really exist.
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 12:04 PM
Well I for one think that the movement away from make-up and wigs on men after the Regency era was a GREAT ADVANCE in human development.
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 12:15 PM
Whatever anybody wants to do that isn't against the law and doesn't hurt another living thing or adversely influence minors is fine with me. Crossdressers? Enjoy yourselves. Transgenders? I am so sorry you have such a difficult life and I can't begin to imagine your emotional pain being a soul of one gender inside a body of the other gender. Transvestites, gays, lesbians, whatever else there may be that I don't know about? Not my business. As long as you act appropriately in public it shouldn't be an issue with anyone. We are all human beings. Life is too short to spend it hating, fearing or making fun of others for being different from what we each believe to be the norm.
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 12:22 PM
LOL, 12:15! It's true that Washington and Jefferson on our US money are both wearing wigs and powder!!
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 12:38 PM
After starting this thread, I was not sure where it would go. I have been amazed at the support that many have written. But also horrified by the inference that it is anything like mass killers behaviour. What sort of a miss lead redneck puts those two together.
He are situations where someone mentally ill has taken the life of others - what a sad waste. Me, I live in a non-gun country, with a beautiful wife and children, work with others in the health and fitness industry, are a normal part of society caring for others, my family and being good for the environment - and I get bundled up with serial killers. Maybe the person that wrote that has a deep hatered of other minority groups - are black, muslims, asians or anything else that does not conform to your normal neighborly person also have a vendetta mass kill others.
Give me a break - Noone would even suspect me as having a fem side! I am a very male individual that plays contact sports, runs and loves watching sports. I dont affect anyone else - only my wife knows and those in cyberland.
So am I really that disturbed cause sometimes I dress as an alterego?
As for how I look, there are many that dress in Drag - very different from cross dressing that do look terrible. I myself really wish that when I do dress that I look like your everyday women - yes I do try to dress classy, but it is only to emulate the women look - and I thought that imitating was the greatest form of flattery there was.
I know that I will never be, and never want to be a women, but let me have my enjoyment without being scared of it - PLEASE!
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 3:39 PM
That you hide your "fem side" is telling.
That you think it's a good thing that people would never guess is disturbing - makes me wonder if it's the successful deceit that you enjoy the most, since it's something you've mentioned more than once and seem proud of.
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 5:01 PM
Why are you looking on here for validation? Who cares what you do in your private life? I'm getting so sick of men in this forum who keep bringing up sexual/kink stuff and want to know what we women think about it. I don't mind women bringing up any topic but I'm tired of the 2 or 3 guys who keep doing this. !! Go away. Find another website. If you want to talk weight and fitness, we're here for you.
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 8:01 PM
I'm not the OP, but in response to 8:01 I do think that questions like this one strike to the core of self-image in the same way that fitness does, and that the two are interrelated in many ways. I do know two women who were born in male bodies (I know this is not cross-dressing.), and when each made her physical transition each lost a considerable amount of weight.
That said, "What do women think," is always a silly way to start a question. "Women" aren't a homogenous bloc -- in fact, there is much more variation in most traits among women than there is in men. Women think all kinds of different things!
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 9:39 PM
Are women grossed out by cross dressers?
Only if i was dating or married to one.
A simple honest answer to your question.
Saturday, September 15, 2007, 9:54 PM
Why are you getting sick of men doing stuff on YOUR SITE!
Is this site not about self image? And it is nothing to do with kink/sex!! Can't you get it throught your head?
I am just as concerned about my body image both internal and external. I try to keep active, toned and loking good in what ever I wear to make me feel good about myself.
yes - it is nice to be accepted by others, and that is why I am here. If you can't accept that (Only to those negative responders out there) then Im sorry - not for me but you - you must be sooooo narrow minded that you are the most important person in the world.
Im just trying to get by - day by day just like the rest of us!
Sunday, September 16, 2007, 8:14 PM
OP, you can't demand someone accept something and then demand that they not be "scared" of it. Like so many say of religion: "don't shove it down our throats".
Monday, September 17, 2007, 9:19 AM
There is no such thing as "being born in the wrong body". You are what you are at birth. What happens in ones' mind after that is just that "in their mind"; and the mind wants to influence the body. You can't argue with nature - there are not "mistakes" in the womb - no matter what your friends tell you.
Monday, September 17, 2007, 9:27 AM
9:27, the mind is in the brain, and the brain is an organ in the body. Like any organ, it can vary a lot among people. What happens in the brain often happens well before birth, during development, and there are many things that can make people's brains -- and therefore their minds -- different. Some are genetic, some are environmental (why we all stay away from alcohol and cigarettes while pregnant, right?), and many are a combination of the two.
Monday, September 17, 2007, 10:16 AM
There are mistakes in the womb sometimes. What about hermaphrodites?
Monday, September 17, 2007, 12:54 PM
Yes. I am grossed out. I would never admit that to my cross dresser friends though.
Monday, September 17, 2007, 1:40 PM
That's not a "mistake" it's a birth defect. And I"m guessing that cross-dressers would not embrace their, er, um, situation as a "defect".
Monday, September 17, 2007, 2:45 PM
Just looked up hermaphrodites and found that the percentage of persons with this condition 0.018%. Since there are so many cross dressers, I'm thinking that they don't fall into the category of hermaphrodites. To me it makes sense that cross dressers, transgenders and the like are not "freaks of nature" as hermaphrodites would be classified. They choose this behaviour, it is not thrust upon them.
Monday, September 17, 2007, 3:00 PM
Okay, so then they're just "unnatural freaks".
Works for me!
Monday, September 17, 2007, 4:27 PM
It doesnt work for me though! I don't choose to feel like this, it is just something from inside. Geez some of you are harsh. Until you have been in the situation - don't tell me how I am feeling!
As for being a freak of nature - on a weight loss website/lifestyle - Im suggesting people how are morbidly obese, or are alcohol dependant, or smoke have bigger issues than I do.
Monday, September 17, 2007, 10:01 PM
No agreement here, the big difference being that I'd date a smoker or a drinker.
But maybe if you keep telling the anonymous PT world that you're not too abnormal, you'll believe it one day.
Monday, September 17, 2007, 10:21 PM
Beleive it? Normality - what is that?
Human behaviour is such a wide and varied scope - where do we draw the line? Nothing is abnormal behaviour. You might think what is unacceptable behaviour and where you draw the line is different for each and everyone of us.
So don't tell me what is abnormal - only variation.
And when it come down to it, what is wrong with variations of behaviour? Diversity is cool in life - would not like to live in a world where we all do exactly the same thing and act the same way and get rid of anything that doesnt fit into our relm. What a boring world that would be.
Monday, September 17, 2007, 10:30 PM
Men dressing as women is normal and cool? Puh-lease.
I doubt most of us find it "boring" for men to enjoy being men on a full-time basis.
Monday, September 17, 2007, 10:56 PM
Im not saying that I am still not a man - just expressing myself in a different manner. Dont you like to get dressed up into stuff that makes you feel good? And who judges you when you do? And if they said that they didnt like it - who's got the issue if it makes you feel good?
I guess you would rather men be men like getting into "dog fighting", drinking to all hours of the day and night, watching sports all the time all that extreme male behaviour!!
I guess my wife is just lucky (and she wil ltell you so) cause she has a wonderful man in her life that is all the things a man needs to be - but also like to go shopping and buy her shoes!
Now what is wrong with that?
Monday, September 17, 2007, 11:12 PM
Nothing. Now go away. buh-bye.
Monday, September 17, 2007, 11:56 PM
Geez and your polite too!
My mother once said - "if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all"
If you cant be constrctive in your conversations then goodbye to you!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007, 12:01 AM
to the OP
The reason you are getting "bundled up with the serial killers" is because of tyour inability to control your "urges" not because of the result of your urges - the two are hardly comparable.
Thursday, September 20, 2007, 10:57 AM
OP, I'm sorry that you are being insulted as you are here! I think you've gotten to the point in this conversation where most liberally-minded individuals are kind of bored with the topic (if it doesn't offend you, and you aren't a cross-dresser, then it doesn't really affect you), but the people who are offended and "grossed out" keep coming back, because this thread really fires them up.
I'm not sure if I could marry a cross dresser (or maybe I just can't picture my husband doing it,) but I could certainly be friends with one, and I don't think it's a mental sickness, as others have said.
And, the person who says you're like a killer b/c you don't repress your urges, well, I wonder what she'd do when faced with a pint of Ben and Jerry's, or something like that! No one represses their urges all the time; that wouldn't be healthy at all!
Thursday, September 20, 2007, 3:39 PM
He IS a cross dresser, why do you think he started this thread???? He's insecure - having his wife's approval apparently isn't enough for him. He somehow feels he needs to make this behavior acceptable by justifying it to everyone here at PT (anonymously, of course).
Thursday, September 20, 2007, 4:06 PM
Im not justifying anything - just asking a question!
Thursday, September 20, 2007, 6:54 PM
And why would I need justification - friendships yes, justification no!
Thursday, September 20, 2007, 6:55 PM
Gee, you've responded to all the negativity with defensiveness, excuses, justifications and accusations of narrow-mindedness. I'd say you're doing more than just asking a question.
Which is why I encourage people to stop keeping this thread alive. This strange little man is seeking attention online just as he does in real life with his strange little hobby.
Friday, September 21, 2007, 1:54 AM
LOL 3:39, re urges I think I almost murdered a pint of italian ice last night. Fortunately the whole thing is only 400 calories, so the damage caused by my freezer massacre can be contained!
So, to get onto a different topic, I have a question for the OP. When you are cross dressing (I gather you don't do it all the time.) do you prefer to be addressed as a man or as a woman? I only ask because if I ever met someone like you I would like to be polite. I was trying to imagine it and realized that I'm totally unaware of the etiquette.
Friday, September 21, 2007, 7:36 AM
I'm not grossed out by it--far from it. I just hate it when the bitches look better than I do!! :)
Friday, September 21, 2007, 1:20 PM
The key way to tell when someone is doing something "wrong" or something they are ashamed of is whether or not they keep it a secret. Overweight people know very well. Just look at the thread about "fat people behavior". To the person who wrote "so long as you're not hurting anyone..." The fact of the matter is that this man IS hurting someone and he doesn't even realize it. He is hurting himself AND his wife who he proclaims is on board with this thing. The bottom line is this: if you are ashamed or embarrassed to tell the world that you are a cross dresser then that's a pretty good indicator that it's "wrong", even in your own mind.
Friday, September 21, 2007, 2:41 PM
Hm, how long will it be before girlie-man hops back on with a heartfelt diatribe about how we need to change what's normal and accepted to include his fetish.
Friday, September 21, 2007, 4:16 PM
hmmm. i say we belittle him and say crude things about issues which we couldn't possibly know anything about. let's make generalizations and judgements and jump to conclusions about the type of person this man is based on his responses about one specific topic. berate, verbally abuse, criticise, and name-call...that'll really make a positive statement.
Friday, September 21, 2007, 4:22 PM
Nah, he'd probably enjoy that too much.
Friday, September 21, 2007, 10:17 PM
I'm glad to have found this thread. I catch myself occasionally thinking in a prejudiced way and try to find ways to convince my subconscious to be more open-minded. Yes, cross-dressers have grossed me out. I think it is because they are doing something that has sexual connotations in public. It goes under too much information. But guys with speedos have grossed me out too. I could easily be friends with a cross-dresser but I don't have what it takes to have a sexual relationship with one. When I'm in a clothing store and I hear a man being vocal in what clothing his wife/girlfriend should buy I get the shivers.
Saturday, September 22, 2007, 9:09 AM
Natural and unnatural freaks of nature
Saw this article about bat bugs and thought of this thread.
Saturday, September 22, 2007, 4:50 PM
For the person asking re etiquette. I suggest you treat anyone you meet with respect no matter what gender they are or how they are dressed. I guess when dressed fem I just like to talked to as a person - it is not about the gender.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007, 7:37 PM
By the way - it still make me laugh that some people cant get past the idea that it is not sexual. Dont you ever get dressed nicely and just enjoy looking fem - or is it about sex for you too. IT IS NOT SEXUAL!!
Tuesday, September 25, 2007, 8:47 PM
It's always sexual. Get real.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007, 8:50 PM
Why is it hard to understand that it is not? Where and why dont you get it?
Tuesday, September 25, 2007, 8:55 PM
It's not hard to understand, it's just not true. THe clothing that women wear that is "feminine" has only one purpose, and that is to attract men. Bottom line. It is not comfortable, and not pleasant to wear, and we as women have been conditioned to adopt these looks and styles to become our own tastes too. But they are only there to attract men, like flower that is bright and smells good to attract bees, a woman wears clothing that emphasizes her ability to reproduce, bras that make the breasts look bigger, makeup that is made to give a more youthful appearance, capable of reproduction, long hair, a sign of youth and health, all the things that make women look like owmen are signs to men that they are capable of reproduction and continuing their blood line. Those things are sexual. Where and why don't you get it?
Tuesday, September 25, 2007, 9:00 PM
Are women grossed out by cross dressers?
I think this thread is hilarious. I can see that many posters do not understand much about transgendered people. Besides, I thought the topic was whether women are grossed out by crossdressers.
But let's touch on crossdressing briefly...
I'm a crossdresser, aka transvestite, aka freak...LOL. And I know a lot of people don't like it. However, there are millions of men in the US alone that crossdress. And there are almost as many misconceptions about crossdressing as there are crossdressers.
I have to agree with some of the posters here - a lot crossdressers look really bad, and are in serious need of help. Maybe there should be a crossdressers version of "What Not To Wear"...LOL. However, there are also some that are very convincing, and who look better than many GGs (genetic girls).
Crossdressing and sexual orientation have little or no correlation. The % of gay, bisexual and straight males in the general populace mirrors that of the crossdressing world. Like many crossdressers, I'm straight. I played sports competitively in school. I like to do typical guy things. You would never know I crossdressed unless I told you.
Most of us do not have any desire to change sex. If we did, we'd be transsexuals.
Lots of people want to differentiate crossdressers from transvestites. Guess what, there is no difference. It's just that people respond even more negatively to the term transvestite.
Whether you like crossdressers or not, we are out there. And unless you are a hermit, you know some of us too, but you are completely unaware of it. And we will likely remain anonymous to you because we don't want to risk a negative reaction.
Some of us are lucky enough to have supportive wives, GFs and significant others. Most, unfortunately, are not so lucky.
The desire to crossdress does not really go away. People do it for lots of reasons. Many will tell you it's not a sexual or erotic thing. Honestly, it is for me - and I actually believe it is for most others too.
A couple hundred years ago, men wore clothing that today is deemed appropriate for women only. Tights/hose, wigs, heels, even dresses...back then it was fasionable and acceptable. Today it is not. Why? Society tells us so. Think I'm being some sort of moralist on his soap box? Then think about the way society rejected women for wearing pants back in the 1920s. Can you imagine a woman being ridiculed today for wearing pants? Or worse - beaten or killed for it?
If you find yourself grossed out, that's ok by me. I only ask that you about why you feel that way.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007, 9:03 PM
Not only a cool repsonse but also there is another cd here.
yes I agree with much of what you say - I am a hetro sexual cd that in no way has a sexual urge from cding. But that is just me, your right we cant generalise.
Nice to know there are others out there.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007, 9:27 PM
This thread has gotten so skeevy I need to shower.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007, 9:58 PM
What does SKEEVY mean?
Wednesday, September 26, 2007, 12:15 AM
Gross. Slimy. Creepy.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007, 1:19 AM
Oh geez thanks.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007, 1:26 AM
9:03...thanks for being open. I like to hear the truth of people's lives and I think the whole gender expression question and how it ls lived is is SO culturally driven and it has little to do with real nature. There is such variety in our population.
As a woman who mostly wears pants and likes to do athletic things this question never comes up. I never even think about it. I look at women who are "painted ladies" and I tend to think "drag" (as in queen)...which strikes me as funny. It's just about culture. I don't wear makeup. SO really, given a culture of tighter constraints I could be considered a cross dresser. But it doesn't come up and I don't have to be secretive about it....and I bet about a quarter the female population in the US would easily drop into the same box as me.
Some people just feel better and truly enjoy dressing to the nines and wearing make-up and wigs. The reality is both men and women like to do that. I tend to feel more comfort in the clothing for function , easy hair and skin care ranges more typical for men. Yet people never question what I do...I look like a casual middle aged woman.
Funny what becomes scary for many people to consider.....and kicks off a judgemental response. Wonder what those people would do if they met George Washington or John Adams on the street. Probably run for cover....or call them skeevy.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007, 10:15 AM
cross dressing on its own is not a problem for me. whatever turns you on. but it does not turn me on so if i found out someone i was dating was a crossdresser and wanted to dress in women's clothes during intimate situations i would probably break up with him. just not into it.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007, 11:01 AM
Hey I can understand everyones point of view. I told my wife when we were dating to avoid all secrecy stuff. SHe is ok with it. I do dress at home by myself and no where else.I do it cause I like it - not for sexual gratification, it is just a form of play acting. Noot huring anyone at all.
As for the women who thinks you are a cross dresser - well done for being honest. In this day and age (speaking from Australia), men are expected to be one way and women have it all. Although the metro sexual look is becoming more popular with our younger males.
So what about PINK - do you like the way she dresses and her attitude - very male. Maybe she is a cross dresser too.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007, 4:54 PM
From such a simple question I have appreciated the thoughts and views of many - thank you all!!
Sunday, October 14, 2007, 11:51 PM
Nearly 100 resposes - go group go!
Tuesday, October 16, 2007, 8:54 PM
I have no quarms what so eva regarding cross dressing, im married to a cross dresser and quite francally it turns me on when he is wearing females items, so unless you have tryed it never get grossed out by it cause its sexy......GO CROSS DRESSES
Tuesday, October 23, 2007, 12:21 AM
12:21...illiterate and obviously pretending to be a woman.
What a shining example.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007, 12:55 AM
You are married to a CD and love it - that is soooooo cool.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007, 1:55 AM
I believe 12:21. I am very close to a married couple and the male is a cross dresser.
Happens all the time, people.....
Tuesday, October 23, 2007, 7:17 AM
And you are ok with it - or does he not do it infront of you but you know?
Wednesday, October 24, 2007, 2:19 AM
Yes, I have seen my friend in his "women attire" and me and my boyfriend are both okay with it.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007, 9:54 AM
When I was in high school I wore tons of "boy" clothes (I'm female) and I loved it. I dress much more feminine now and I love that too. My husband gets his jeans in the "girl" section when we shop. That doesn't bother me one bit. I wouldn't stop myself from buying "boy" clothing at the store if I liked it.
There are varying levels of cross-dressing and it doesn't bother me one bit. My husband and I may be on the low-end of the spectrum.
To everyone who is "grossed-out" about cross-dressers...
It's just life. Don't take it so seriously.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007, 1:16 PM
It's just life?
It's deviant. It's deceptive. It's freakish.
I don't think I like your definition of life.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007, 1:18 PM
That's what's so beautiful about life...you don't need to agree with me, and I don't need to agree with you. We are all different and wonderful.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007, 1:22 PM
If we all thought and agreed about the same things, we'd have nothing to talk about.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007, 1:24 PM
I just guess some people just dont like any other ice-cream than vanilla? (metaphor for those that didnt get it).
People have various versions of what they think is and isnt acceptable - we all do - I guess from my perspective it is to say that dont tarnish everyone with the same brush! Just cuase someone like to do something that you are not that comfortable with doesnt mean that it is wrong!! There are far worse things in the world than males or females wearing a variety of clothes that make them feel comfortable.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007, 10:23 PM
Thursday, November 01, 2007, 1:14 AM
One of my favorite customers at work is a man who is choosing to live his life as a woman. I absolutely love her. Every time she comes in, she's a delight. I live in a very uptight suburban, yuppie type of area so I know that she doesn't get the same respect even from other employees where I work. But I come from a very urban, culturally diverse area originally, so no one who is "abnormal" makes me uncomfortable. Even if I didn't feel comfortable with cross-dressers, I would never disrespect someone because of the way they choose to live their lives.
Thursday, November 01, 2007, 10:00 AM
Why hasn't this thread died? Do you crossdressers suffer from some kind of Attention-Desperate Disorder, preferably in the form of abuse and ridicule?
Thursday, November 01, 2007, 10:16 AM
Nice comment by the last person - obviously a supportive and delightful person to know!!
Thursday, November 01, 2007, 7:55 PM
OP....you're a sad little man for continuing to keep this tired thread alive. (Yes, I realize I'm putting it back at the top by responding, but it's only the number 5 thread right now.) I believe you like thinking you're getting our panties in a twist by getting us riled up. Too bad panties look SO much better on us, than on you. You come across as so creepy. Please go away.
Thursday, November 01, 2007, 9:24 PM
They probably look better on other I would suggest!!
Friday, November 02, 2007, 12:30 AM
are women grossed out about crossdressing
Nice respose .I think society and the era in which we live has a stereotyped idea of gender.Men and women of ancient Egypt both wore make up and clothes that were a lot alike. Could it be that they saw real beauty from the inside as well as the out.Could it be they were less critical of their gender identity.I always ponder these revelations from the past that our modern day gender stamping fails to utilize or understand.We all can benifit by slowing down,not allowing fear of the unknown to influence our critisisms and looking inside as well as out .
Saturday, December 08, 2007, 11:19 AM
Die thread, die!
Saturday, December 08, 2007, 1:27 PM
Why is this still circulating and does anyone even really care?
Saturday, December 08, 2007, 3:15 PM
It's the transwhatevers looking for a bit more attention. As usual.
Saturday, December 08, 2007, 4:40 PM
courage or itch
try holding something in all your life from your friends and loved ones thinking that if they found out, there would be no one left to love you. I could write a book about the kind of courage it takes to dare to be different. Whether your a crossdresser, gay, bi, lesbian or transsexual. It doesn't even have to be a gender issue at all. Just dare to oppose the norm, or the majority. Then tell me it was just an itch that needed to be scratched
Wednesday, January 09, 2008, 12:10 AM
Are women grossed out by cross dressers?
To answer your question, yes but only if it were someone I was dating. If it were a friend or family member, no.
You sound like a sad person. Have you tried other forums on the web for people who are going through what you're going through? I can imagine most people on this site are more interested in nutrition and exercise, as opposed to the feelings of cross dressing men. Don't mean to sound harsh, just a thought.
Wednesday, January 09, 2008, 12:35 AM
"I could write a book about the kind of courage it takes to dare to be different."
Yeah, like trying to love yourself when your well over 200 lbs and the world seems to despise you for it. (and most of the men out there) So you surround yourself with people who love you no matter what.
Wednesday, January 09, 2008, 12:41 AM
Another cry for attention in the guise of an inflated sense of self-importance.
Courageous my ass.
Wednesday, January 09, 2008, 12:58 AM
First of all I'd like to clarify some terms. Crossdressers are the same as transvetites. Most crossdressers prefer the term crossdresser. Transgender is an umbrella term that emcompasses all gender bending activites. Such as crossdressing, transsexualism, drag queens, female impersonators, androgyny. MOST crossdressers are straight but some are gay. Crossdressers crossdress for different reasons. Some do it for a sexual thrill. Others do it to relieve stress. Such as a man maybe the boss of a comapany and is in charge all day. When he comes home he crossdresses to relieve that stress. Others do it becuase they like the style of clothing or the fit of the clothing. Not everyone has the same body. You have seen some women that don't have the curves some women do. They are straight up and down with no hips or no butt, so they may buy men's jeans. Some men on the other hand may have some curves with hips and butt so he may choose to buy jeans in the women's department. I also want to say that I do not understand people that say that women can wear men's clothes so why can't men wear women's clothes? Here's what I think. The men that say this are crossdressing males. They don't stop with just the clothes. It's the hair, make-up, etc. They want to pass for a woman. Women don't want to pass as a man. They just enjoy some of the men's clothing. Another thing I would like to add, I think any crossdressers out there that complain that their wives don't accept them after telling them should only blame themselves for not telling them BEFORE getting married. I think all crossdressers that are looking to marry someone should tell them that they are crossdressers so that they know their marriage will or will not be compatible. Also, I would like to add that not all transsexuals are attracted to men. MOST are but a small minority are attracted to females. Still some are attracted to both sexes. There are also transsexuals out there that haven't had and doesn't plan on having the operation for various reasons and are referred to as non-op transsexuals. See, it isn't what sexual organ you were born with, it's how you feel inside. I am a non-op transsexual and I am attracted to females. I am considered a minority within a minority.
Thursday, February 28, 2008, 4:41 AM
question for 4:41
Thanks for that info it is interesting. could you explain more about how cross dressing can relieve stress? as in the case of the business man in charge all day - what part about putting the different clothes on gives the feeling of relaxation? this is not a smart ass question - just trying to understand. thanks
Thursday, February 28, 2008, 5:49 AM
Way more than anyone wants to know.
Thursday, February 28, 2008, 9:29 AM
Speak for yourself, 9:29. I found 4:41's message insightful.
Thursday, February 28, 2008, 11:36 AM
Too many men still think of women as the submissive gender with less responsibility (remember, they don't historically hold child-rearing in high regard). So to look and act like a woman is a type of "surrender".
I've had more than one man say to me that "paying for a (sex-act-of-choice) is the equivalent of you getting a pedicure". I personally think it's just a sorry, sniveling excuse. Yeah, life is so hard for a man.
Thursday, February 28, 2008, 3:05 PM
nope - more power to them!
Thursday, February 28, 2008, 4:30 PM
I would rather date a cross-dresser than a drinker
Thursday, February 28, 2008, 6:47 PM
Not really. Who cares? It's not like they're beating anyone up, killing anyone, abusing. They're the ones being abused. It's really sad.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008, 1:38 PM
I am totally fascinated by this thread of conversation from the very closed minded opinions to the very enlightened responses. The essence of this is really all about respect and tolerance for the difference of others. Some men choose to dress and some women choose not to like that they do.
In an enlightened world we accept all truths as valid to the holder. Those who dislike it have a right to that belief. Those who like it have a right to that belief too.
I am a male to female cross dresser who has had to learn first and foremost to accept this in myself. It took a long time for me to understand that this is a part of what defines me as a person. This self discovery came at a high price, the end of a 25 year relationship, however, I would rather be true to myself than continue to live in a situation that required me to be unhappy and unhealthy.
Cross dressing is not for everyone, that is their right. Cross dressing is, however, a reality for millions of men, that is their right too. Cross dressing is only cross dressing by cultural definition, as someone pointed out, what was okay long ago would be considered cross dressing today, so this makes the point that it is not a sickness, however, the feelings that drive cross dressing are very deep and very wide within us. It is not something that we choose to be, who in their right mind would put themselves through all of this if it was. It is a need that is partially expressed through clothing, however, it is also expressed through many other means (quite often not sexual at all) such as how we think, feel, emote, relate to others...The other important thing to understand is that biological sex is not the same as gender. Biological sex is assigned at birth and only changeable through surgery. Gender is very fluid and not strictly tied to your biology.
Behaving in feminine ways is not meant to be a parody of women, rather it is an appreciation of feminine things. Many men like feminine (as well as masculine) things. Many women like masculine (as well as feminine) things. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, it is just a form of self expression. It speaks to the similarities between men and women rather than their differences, we are more alike than we admit.
So in the end, let us embrace our humanity and respect the differences of others.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008, 4:26 PM
Ew. Gross. Die in a very embarrassing way.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008, 8:11 PM
Dear Sir, I do not believe you'll change anyone's mind in this forum. We're here to support each other in weight loss/maintenance or to receive good tips on healthy living. I think I can speak for many in that we don't care about a man's orientation here. Do you think anyone really cares about your issue? I'm not saying its not valid, but this may not be the best or most appropriate place to climb up onto your platform. This thread had died a while ago and I see you're back to revive it. Stop trying to push buttons and go into another website, will you? (and no, I'm not one of the closed minded compared to "enlightened" people you talk about) You seem rather predatory. Please go away.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008, 8:37 PM
Usually people complain about posters not using the search function and reviving old threads, now a complaint that a thread has been revived (again).
I'm embarrassed by the two previous posters. Disgusting.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008, 9:41 PM
8:11 you're a jacka$$. Did you actually wish death on another human being? Karma can be a real bitch.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008, 10:16 PM
Better a jackass than a whiney misunderstood crossdresser begging for attention and abuse from anonymous women. It's what he wants, or else he wouldn't constantly return to shine the spotlight on himself. I'd rather deal with bitchy, critical women than disgusting men who use this forum to feed their perversion.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008, 11:23 PM
I appreciate the support and commentary of those who while not accepting of this at least respect the rights of others to speak their truth and live their lives as the see fit.
I feel pity for those who are so closed minded that they feel that they have to put others down to build themselves up. It is very sad that they have such a poor sense of self esteem that they feel a need to put others down to feel worthy.
Thursday, April 17, 2008, 12:16 PM
It's a free contry and a person should be able to look the way want to .
Tuesday, July 01, 2008, 4:01 PM
Let's leave it here. I think there has been enough said on both sides to get a good idea of both sides of the issue. Why is this being brought back to the top again?
Tuesday, July 01, 2008, 4:10 PM
If being perverted doesn't bother you, that's between you and
God. As for me, Romans 2:24 says...Wherefore God also gave them up to uncleanness through the lusts of their own hearts, to dishonour their own bodies between themselves...who changed the truth of God into a lie...For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature...READ ON!!!
Tuesday, July 01, 2008, 4:53 PM
What in the world does that have to do with cross dressing? Wasn't it written when men wore skirts anyway?
Tuesday, July 01, 2008, 7:52 PM
Is it just men wearing women's clothes that's the problem or can it be the other way around. I LOVE wearing guys shorts! The pocket space is great, and I like how the waist sizes are in inches! I don't have to waste time trying on the clothes to make sure they fit. Unfortunately, they only go down to size 28 but they have drawstrings for that! Yay.
I've also bought boy's sized work boots before. They are generally a bit wider than the womens work boots.
I guess what I'm trying to say is would this behavior be classified as perverted?
Oh, and don't get me started on the merits of flannel shirts. Quilted or otherwise!
Wednesday, July 02, 2008, 11:15 AM
The difference is, you don't get a freaky sex kick out of it.
Wednesday, July 02, 2008, 11:46 AM
The restroom part bothers me
I am not creeped out by cross-dressers. However, at my place of business, the policy is that employees should use the restroom of the gender they are dressed as. I have to admit that it does creep me out a little knowing that there is a guy in the ladies room. I imagine guys would also be a freaked by having a lady in the men's room.
The specific employee who I know is a cross-dressed doesn't bother me so much - he's never struck me as threatening in any way. However, I don't like the idea that some creep could dress as a woman in order to go in the ladies' room to peep or worse.
To 4:53, FYI, many cross-dressers aren't homosexual; they just identify more with the opposite sex.
Wednesday, July 02, 2008, 12:03 PM
But to answer the original question, I'm not grossed out by cross-dressers. I just don't understand why they wear sooo much make up. Same goes for women that wear alot too. That's creepy to me. Like Tammy Fae Baker. And there's that other one I remember from that Christian Channel. That lady with the pink hair. Is she still on? Buurhhh she skeeved me out! She could be a guy, there's no way to tell for sure from looking at her.
Wednesday, July 02, 2008, 5:00 PM
yes, completely. Gross!
Wednesday, July 02, 2008, 9:14 PM
I think because its like putting on a 'show' - like being in a chorus line on Broadway or something. Also, men probably feel they need to do themselves up more to look like a woman. And finally, part of the fun for them is wearing women's clothes and make-up, the more the better I guess.
My friend is a cross dresser and his wife is a professional choregrapher. They are both very 'showy' people.....
Wednesday, July 02, 2008, 9:30 PM
Yeah, That makes sense.
I'm in theatre too and those actors have to really cake it on depending on the show, mostly the musicals. For the cross dressers though, I guess that's what they think women look like? I've always wanted to ask but I didn't know if that would come across as rude. The most 'female' looking males that I have ever seen on stage was our production of Nunsense and the men had hardly any makeup on at all, just the habits. The rest was just acting. When they wear all of the makeup it's like they're drawing attention to what isn't 'female' looking by exaggerating it.
Thursday, July 03, 2008, 12:18 PM
Not at all. Live and let live. I wouldn't want to date a guy that liked to dressed up really femme with make up, lingerie and all the frills, but he could be one of my best friends.
Thursday, July 03, 2008, 10:42 PM
Cross dressing doesn't gross me out as far as something someone else does. I completely accept that everybody is different and different things make different people happy/comfortable. As a woman, I enjoy dressing a little masculine sometimes. I prefer feminine cuts of clothing, but I have a pinstriped suit that I love. I wear it with a wife beater, and a tweed hat. My next goal is to get suspenders and a tie to go with it. Perhaps a nice pair of patent leather oxfords.
As for cross dressing men, I don't think I'd be comfortable being in a relationship with one. I wouldn't have a problem with a transsexual who was passable (either male or female- I'm bi), but, for unknown reasons (and have thought a lot about it) I just couldn't do it. I would never discourage a friend from cross dressing if he wanted to though, I just don't think I'd be in a relationship with him.
Thursday, July 03, 2008, 10:51 PM
CD doesnt gross me out but i would be pissed if my bf looked better in my clothes then i did! lol
peace and love for all!
Friday, July 04, 2008, 1:13 PM
lol - 1:13 :) So true!
Friday, July 04, 2008, 5:49 PM
Are women grossed out by cross dressers?
Some women are. Some women aren't. I am grossed out by crossdressing. I have been involved with a cross dresser for two years. He is a good man, an honorable man. After a year, he told me about the crossdressing. I wanted so badly to be able to accept it. I was in love with him. I wanted only the best for him always. Month after month I struggled to accept the crossdressing. Intellectually, I supported him. But after intensive soul searching, I have to admit my limitation. I am turned off by cross dressing. I no longer wish to spend my energy to accept his crossdressing. I don't have very much energy to begin with, because I have multiple sclerosis. I do not want to spend my energy on emotional angst. I wanted to stay with him, to grow old with him. After a year, I am ready to stop fighting my own nature. In terms of my own relationship, I am sexually repulsed by crossdressing. I wanted so, so, so bad to get to the point that I could accept it. But I am grossed out by crossdressing.
Friday, July 25, 2008, 3:56 PM
To those who keep commenting for this thread to die, quit coming in here and feeding your own perversions.
There are some who have not read this thread yet (such as me) and it is interesting to read others views.
OP, obiviouslyl if you are married then there are women who dont mind, or may be attracted to cd's. I cant help but feel that you are asking this question because of your own insecurity.
I have only known of one cd. He is married with 2 children. I have seen him around town and he struck as odd where I didnt even want to know him even before I found out he was a cd. I have talked to his wife and children on several occasions and like them very much.
To be honest I dont know if I would be attracted to a cd. I am attracted to an individual. But if he turned out to be cd, I dont know how I would feel. As a woman I want a man to walk in the door and talk to me and hold me. I suppose a lot would depend on his behaviors and if they were things that I could live with. I would definitely want to know before we were married, but wouldnt want the whole community to know. Not so much for shame, but because I am a private person and dont feel the need to share intimate details with everyone on the planet.
To any of the cd's here, I hope you dont mind me asking some questions. When did you first discover you liked or wanted to cross dress? Did you feel more of a closeness with one parent over the other? As a child did you have special blankets or toys or something that you liked to cuddle with, maybe they just felt good or comforted you? Have you felt ashamed or confused about cding? Do you have friends that you cd with and/ or discuss aspects of cd with? How do you feel when you crossdress, are you more relaxed like it is an escape? Do you wear an item (like underwear) on a regular basis and the other clothing after your at home? Would you like to be more accepted and be able to go out in public, go shopping, etc. while wearing women's clothing? Is it more the feel of the fabric or the style of womens clothes? I have known some men that where some of the African style outfits that are sort of like muumuus but with African graphics on them, but the fabric is a little bit rougher. Don't you find bras uncomfortable?
Sorry if these questions sound stupid, but they just came flying out of me. I could come up with a bunch more if I wasnt so tired.
Saturday, July 26, 2008, 12:59 AM
Not at all, but I wouldn't date or marry one. They can do whatever they please as long as they aren't encroaching on anyone else's rights. But when I'm with a man, I want him to be all man. I can't get 'in the mood" with a guy who likes to wear make up or lacy panties. KWIM?
Saturday, July 26, 2008, 12:50 PM
I probably would not be attracted to a CD'er for the sole reason that I like to be "the pretty one." :) There's only room for one queen in da house, baby!
Monday, July 28, 2008, 1:44 PM
Delaware Crossdresser ready to answer questions
Hi, I'm a CD. I'm 43 years old, and I'm happy to say I'm with a wife who is loving, understanding, forgiving, most important (PATIENT). She took the time to learn about transgender issues. She didn't assume, lump me into any categories, attack me, or anything like that. Of course, I did tell her long before her and I got married and we waited a long time before getting married. Today, we have two children together, we both learned to accept the feminine side and I do keep it under control. She also needs her man too, and I understand that in a marriage it's give an take. I love her so much for all she gives and I constantly give back, or I try to.
Now, to the woman who had all the questions. I'm going to try to answer them for you as best I can. By the way, thank you for asking. I think it's important that we do ask questions.
"To any of the cd's here, I hope you dont mind me asking some questions."
Not at all, please ask.
"When did you first discover you liked or wanted to cross dress?"
I can remember as far back as six years old, I found myself interested in womens clothing.
"Did you feel more of a closeness with one parent over the other?"
I guess my mother, but that's only because my mother raised me on her own until she met my father. I was about three when she met him. I never knew he wasn't my biological father until I was in my late 30's. It only makes sense though that I had more of a closeness with my mother, and it really had nothing to do with my crossdressing. I rarely ever talked to her about it out of embarrassment.
"As a child did you have special blankets or toys or something that you liked to cuddle with, maybe they just felt good or comforted you?"
Hmm, I can't recall anything special.
"Have you felt ashamed or confused about cding?"
Absolutely. It's very hard on those of us who have to live this nightmare. To all those women who find us disgusting, I can't say much other than you really have no idea what it's like. It's hard, and if you study anything on crossdressers, you will find we go through emotional roller coasters.
I can't speak for others, I can speak for myself though.
Growing up, I tried everything I could do to supress the feminine feelings. I tried all the sports, I joined the military thinking it would change me, you name it..I tried it. I have gone through boughts of suicide thoughts, begging for an answer as to why I wanted to express myself in a feminine way. Why did I like to wear dresses? Why did I like pantyhose so much? Why did I want to look like a girl.
I'm not gay either, so for some who think we must be gay..think again. You will find that approximately 95% of crossdressers are heterosexual men. You will also find that it's FAR more common than you think. For those women who thinks it's disgusting, I bet you that you've been associated with more men who crossdress and you just didn't know it. We are masters at hiding it.
"Do you have friends that you cd with and/ or discuss aspects of cd with?"
I have joined crossdressing organizations, to help me learn to cope and understand why this happens. My wife has gone with me, and it really has helped her as well. She learned, not only does she have a husband, but she has a best friend as well. We both learned to handle both "personalities" together.
"How do you feel when you crossdress, are you more relaxed like it is an escape?"
ABSOLUTELY. Speaking for myself, I feel great. I feel like I can be someone I want to be or wished I could be.
" Do you wear an item (like underwear) on a regular basis and the other clothing after your at home?"
Yes and no. The urge to wear womens attire comes in waves. It's not constant. There are periods I want nothing at all to do with it. But if I had to pick an item I like, I love silk and I love pantyhose. Just something about how they feel against the skin that feels really nice. Come on girls, you know I'm right. We all have things we like and we do love the nicer materials against our skin. I know I'm not alone on that one.
"Would you like to be more accepted and be able to go out in public, go shopping, etc. while wearing women's clothing?"
That's every crossdressers dream.
"Is it more the feel of the fabric or the style of womens clothes?"
Both, but probably leaning more towards the feel.
"I have known some men that where some of the African style outfits that are sort of like muumuus but with African graphics on them, but the fabric is a little bit rougher. Don't you find bras uncomfortable?"
Sometimes, underwire can be a pain in the you know what.
Thanks for the questions, I love answering them. Girls, you will probably be surprised as to just how many men crossdress. Most hide it, very few expose it. You will also find men who crossdress and have women who are either friends or more, that these men are more caring, sensitive, understanding, and believe it or not..better lovers because we are more in tune with touch, feel, and emotions than we are with just getting our jollies.
Don't judge a book by its cover. To those of of you who have already closed your minds, too bad. You probably missed out on some fun times and a very good friend.
If any of you girls who live near Delaware, and would love to have a good shopping partner, look me up. I'm a HUGE fan of Victorias Secrets.
Saturday, October 25, 2008, 2:06 AM
I'm not a woman so the question was not addressed to me, but I'd like to say several things. First, I find ALL fetishes to be weird, and while they don't gross me out, they weird me out like hospitals do. People who like wearing diapers, people who love wearing animal suits and writhing around on the floor together, men obsessed with women's feet. There used to even be a site I heard about (never saw it, so this may not be true) that featured women in bikinis crushing bugs with their high heels!
Second, however, it is the fetishes themselves that are abnormal for people to have, it is NOT the people who are abnormal. All people have odd makeups of things that they like, which, of course, includes sexual things.
Third, this brings me to the point that people are the way they are, and it is natural to who they are, and they probably have little to no choice in the matter. So for me, it goes beyond simply saying "people should do what the want," though I do believe that is true. They might be odd, in the same way that an old recluse is odd, or the same way someone who lives to dress up as a civil war soldier once a month is odd, or the way someone who spends five hours every Sunday for five months watching football I personally find to be odd.
Juist because it's different from what we ourselves like to do or are attracted to do doesn't make these people wrong, it just makes them different from us. But everyone is different from us, just not to such an extent. So labeling such people with epithets is wrong. Treating them as anythign other than another living person is wrong. At the same time, people who lash out with abuse against fetishists are not warped themselves. Again, that's just who they are. They probably cannot help it. They also are simply not used to it, and if they were ever around fetishists and came to know them as the real people they are, might end up being friends with them. You never know.
Finally, there are more people participating in "different" sex than any of us are even clsoe to being aware of. And this is largely because people are afraid to let even their closest friends know, for fear of being labeled or scorned. So knock it off. Assuming most decent people not to me racist or xenophobic or have other such biases that don't make any sense, as people are people, they shouldn't treat people with fetishes any different than people of a different skin color or a diffferent global culture.
Saturday, October 25, 2008, 10:23 AM
Ok, there are those here that are crossdressers that say it is not about sex. There are those here that are not crossdressers that say it is about sex. From what I read that there are degrees of crossdressers. Some say it's not about sex and some say it is and some say that it used to be about sex and now that they are older it's less about sex. I don't know but there are some crossdressers that do go out in public that need some lessons. A lot of them look rediculous. If you want to dress female than you should learn to blend in not stand out. If it's a fetish to you and you like caking all that makeup on your face and wearing tight mini skirts on a body that is 50 lbs. overweight then leave it at home.
Thursday, November 13, 2008, 3:36 AM
But some woman dressed and made up in the same garish style is ok? Please
Thursday, November 13, 2008, 2:27 PM
LOL, I'm not the 3:36 PP, but I think that his or her point is general -- if you are a
who is 50 pounds overweight the micro-mini skirt doesn't look any better than it does on a guy!
Friday, November 14, 2008, 8:48 AM
I love them. If I see a queen, it might as well start raining jelly beans. That's how happy I get.
I don't know why. Maybe I'm just a really devoted fag hag!
(I totally am!)
Friday, November 14, 2008, 11:14 AM
This is a fascinating thread. I'm posting to bump it up to see what more people have to say. Hopefully this will continue more intelligent exchanges beyond the basic gut reaction to fear what we do not understand.
Friday, November 14, 2008, 12:07 PM
I am gay and I have a long history with the gay community so I have seen lots of guys in drag. I love drag...it's a riot. Painted ladies. Gay Pride is overrun with this kind of crossdressing. The spirit behind it is celebration and fun.
I used to work in an office with (straight) women who wore way too much makeup and perfume. They were prissy were stereotypically overdone ladies and the funny thing was I saw them much in the same way I saw them in the same way I saw drag queens...kind of jokey and partying only these women were dead serious about their appearance. Funny how that works.
I know several people who are trangender both female to male and male to female. The energy behind this is entirely different. There is an earnest quality. Exploration and for some people a quality of stealth (or hiding).
There is a range of expression being talked about on this thread. I laugh and clap and celebrate with the wonderful queens I see at Gay Pride and usually they blow me kisses. I work hard to understand my transgender brothers and sisters and I don't celebrate with them. Instead I listen.
And the painted ladies in the office, guess I had more trouble understanding them. I saw what they were doing as a waste of lifeblood and energy. I felt like they were disguising their beauty.
I don't really know any straight men who cross dress. It appears the the original author of this thread was coming from that place. I don't really understand but I guess I put them somewhere between the queens and the painted ladies. It seems about finding elusive comfort in private. There is an underground quality too. And fear of being discovered.
It's fascinating what gender pulls up for each of us. I feel really comfortable in the female body I was born into. I don't wear much makeup. I dress up occasionally but don't feel like I have to much. I love soft comfortable clothes with pretty colors. I wear mens sturdy pants on occasion, and tend to buy men's shorts because they are longer in the leg and I want the coverage. But I don't experience this as cross dressing. It's simply practical.,
There are so many unspoken gender laws out there in our culture. I am sure many men would rather die than admit they buy "women's" clothing or stuff.
Friday, November 14, 2008, 6:08 PM
Im not atleast Im from a younger generation though I know my mom is a little freaked out by it lol. I dont care, gay straight, hermaphadite, tranny, whatever people make there own choices and other people need to mind there own business.. My mom always told me if I have nothing nice to say dont say anything.
Friday, November 14, 2008, 6:21 PM
Cross dressers don't bother me.
Friday, November 14, 2008, 6:33 PM
Cross dressers don't bother me. I love to say hello and feel the love from the Nuns of Perpetual Indulgence at our annual solstice parade. They're sweet. Would I ever date a cross dresser? No. I don't find it sexy at all and its actually a turn off in a man I'm considering as an intimate partner. We all have our likes and dislikes, right? Live and let live.
Saturday, November 15, 2008, 5:40 PM
No, crossdressers don't bother me, but you know who does? Those AIG execs who have the b@lls to continue their swanky parties and accept millions in bonues using the bailout money. Talk about shameful behavior.
Saturday, November 15, 2008, 8:12 PM
I saw one in Sephora yesterday. I wanted to make her feel comfortable.... just smiled hello.
Saturday, November 15, 2008, 9:24 PM
Um, yes. Maybe it's just being of a shallow mind, but I prefer men who wear men's clothing. Then again, I don't know of any, or the reasons why they feel the need to crossdress. Overall, I don't care either way. It's really none of my business.
Monday, November 17, 2008, 8:17 AM
I think you see a lot of overdone make up and outfits because a cd has so little time to be 'herself' (because of family life, work etc) that they exaggerate it. TGs who's transitioned don't do this, probably because they get to be women all the time. On behalf of the CD community, I apologize, many of us need lessons in make up.
The secrecy is an beef for many here, but just consider, for a moment, the amount of prejudice out there (or in here). Many (probably most) women reject crossdressing. Most men reject it. Surprisingly, I find that men, once they get over the initial 'gay' shock, are oftentimes more accepting than women.
For myself, I love the expression I can have as a 'woman'. Dancing is totally fun. Outfits are wicked fun (not fetish type mind you). Jewelry. Colors. You can talk about how you feel (guys don't do this). You can talk about hair, outfits, colors (guys don't do this). It's a blast.
I just wish people wouldn't feel so threatened by us cd's. We just want to have fun, just like everyone else. We're not psychos, we're not out to hurt anyone. A lot of CDs are very intelligent, with a wicked sense of humor. You'd find they're great fun if you just get past the label.
It's taught me a lot of tolerance, intolerance, and how difficult it is for people to get over their hangs up. They just want us to go away, die, be killed, or whatever.
So much for the new age of enlightenment.
Thursday, November 20, 2008, 8:36 PM
I am very tolerant of cd's. More power to you. The question you asked was "are women grossed out by cross dressers?" I know many, many women who are not grossed out by them, they're fun to hang with and they're great friends partly because they're not threatening. Being sexually attracted to a cd is another thing. I am not sexually attracted to a man who cross dresses and I don't personally know any woman who date them. We all have our own tastes in men, right? Nothing wrong with that.
Thursday, November 20, 2008, 9:20 PM
I'm a heterosexual female and I think straight, cross-dressing men can be sexy.
I wasn't raised to believe that sexual appeal looks only one specific way and therefore everything else is unattractive. I feel so fortunate to have not been subjected to that kind of social conditioning growing up.
What I think is "gross" in a man is: poor hygene, ignorance, & selfishness.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008, 8:47 PM
Cross dress letter for m or f 12/28/08
There are as many women that cross dress every day and there are many woman that are so male because of their hormone levels that they look more male then female. They have a male/female body and have to shave their face; they don't wear makeup because they don't feel it’s for them. There are thousands of women that take jobs that men have because they feel bad and look SO manly. We don't ridicule this woman as such, but there are women that put these woman down just because they want to cruel, well I'm sorry but all women cannot all be beautiful. So these woman wear manly cloths and look and feel manly because that is how they where born. There are tens of thousands of men that love women that are more boyish or manly because that is what these men identify with. All this is true to life and the same is true for men that cross dress and we should all give them the same respect that we give women that cross dress because we live in a country where we are free to express our self without persecution. I suggest to you to be more understanding and kind to each other, I fought for freedom and I will defend any ones right to express them self even if I disagree with them or even if I don't like what they want to do with there own body and there own lives ( man or woman )
Thank you JB cdts
Sunday, December 28, 2008, 12:46 PM
Straighten the Record
To set it straight. These are the diffences.
1)Crossdressers - are straight, but like wearing womans clothes.
2)Transvestites - are gay and like wearing womens clothes.
3)Transexuals - believe they were born the wrong sex and wish for a sex change.
.......just for the record.
Sunday, December 28, 2008, 7:42 PM
Sunday, December 28, 2008, 8:27 PM
Absolutely! No open-mindedness here and no apologies either.
Sunday, December 28, 2008, 9:24 PM
I love women who love cross dressers
I cross dress and I enjoy the release of tension I get when I allow the female side of me come out. I am not gay and I do not like boys. I guess I am a male lesbian. I would love to meet and greet any lady that is not grossed out on this subject. Why should girls have all the fun of dressing up. I love the feel of panties and pantyhose. Girls if you haven't asked your male friend to try on your panties you are missing something. That is how I began my journey into femininity. Also your man will become much more aware of your needs and might even love to go shopping with you
Tuesday, January 27, 2009, 12:02 PM
Oh please. At least be honest with yourself, ok? You started your "journey into femininity" by wearing panties? Undergarments do not make us "feminine". If you really want to explore your fem side more, allow yourself to cry, to feel, to be more compassionate, giving, loving and take better care of your friends/family/self. Volunteer at a shelter for battered women. You're obviously posting here just for kinks. Go away, creep.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009, 4:41 PM
I'm new here, but I thought this website was to discuss weight loss ideas. Somebody please direct me to those threads....I'm leaving now. Bye.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009, 6:29 PM
It's not gross, don't ever think that, just uncommon....
Wednesday, January 28, 2009, 12:26 AM
Yes, this woman is. I am supportive of gay rights, I"m a liberal, but men dressing like women is wierd. Let's all be honest.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009, 12:31 AM
I am a totally hetero woman, I have four beautiful children and lead a relatively 'normal' life......
I find TV's extremely attractive, mostly because they are so obviously not women and it takes a lot of nerve to do that in public! TV's are just like actors to me, I know that a man is beneath all the makeup and clothing, a human being in his own right.
It is sad that so many on this thread have such desperately narrow minds
Each to his own !
Thursday, January 29, 2009, 5:17 PM
Well, I'm not grossed out by it.
But yeah, you gotta be up front with people. Don't wait until the honeymoon.
Thursday, January 29, 2009, 7:36 PM
Are women grossed out by cross dressers?
Are women grossed out by cross dressers?
Why is it that any one would be grossed out by this? It is just clothing. Do you look at a person’s shoes and say – Oh my he/she is just pure trash just because you do not like the style of color?
What is it that grosses you out? Could it just simply be the public brain washing you have received clear back from childhood.
Have you ever asked your self why women can wear a three-piece suit and no one ever says a word because it is just a fashion statement?
Have you ever sit down and talked with a crossdresser? Have you ever though even just for one minute why they crossdress? Have you ever thought that maybe there is more to it that just someone wanting to wear a nice pair of leggings with a matching tank top or even a nice sundress? Have you ever thought that it may not be a free choice and that it could even be genetic?
I would bet not to most all of the above.
I am a 53-year-old crossdresser that now sports a very nasty scare because I tried to blow my brains out because of crossdressing. WHY – Oh let me see, could it be because I was born this way and never really had a choice about it and have never truly understood why, but have always had to do it just the same as most everyone else would to breath air. I can not remember not having the feeling that I was different and can not remember not being ashamed. From the time I was old enough to think, I always wondered why and asked God so many times why I was like this, and asked just as many times to make me better or take me from this world. When he did not help me I tried to do it myself with a 9mm handgun in my mouth and pulled the trigger. I have seen a number of shrinks that some understood and knew a little about it and some that was plum stupid and made me feel even worse than I did.
Am I a sissy? No – I am not, but what I am is a very caring 53 year old logger that would just as soon break your nose as to here you say anything bad about one of us now.
Do I think I am pretty? No – by no means do I feel that I am pretty, but I do feel whole and that there is not another part of me screaming to get out
Am I gay? By no means, I love women and admirer them, but I no longer condemn gays because I now know that it is not a free choice for most of them either.
Do I want to be a woman? Hard question, but NO – I do not. I like being a male but I also like the freedom of choice a woman has when it comes to clothing, make-up and how the look and feel.
Have I lost love, friends or family because of it? YES – most definitely I have. I lost the one woman that I ever cared for or loved and the mother of my children. No one could ever replace this women or my love for her, but she, as she tried could not accept it or come to terms with it
Have I come to terms with it? No – not really because society with not let me, but what I have come to terms with is that I am not a bad person because of it. I have spent literally hundreds and hundreds of hours researching it and found out there is no magical cure and no pills to take so it will go away. I have found out that about one in every ten men suffer from it. I now know that we all start out life in the womb as females and that sometimes things go amuck and some of us retain a little more of the inner female than others. I have found that in general we care for others more, we are more understanding and compassionate. We are fun people that love life as a rule and we are great to go shopping with. We understand the question – Do you think this would look good on me.
This could go on and on and on. So PLEASE just sit down and talk with a real crossdresser. Not just someone that gets aroused from it or chooses freely to dress. I think most everyone would be surprised at what they found out and would walk away with a new friend that they could count on for ANYTHING. I think you would more understand it before you say bad things to or about them.
Will I ever find love again or even someone that would take me for who I am? Even though I pray for it daily, I doubt it very much. I feel I will die alone without evenr knowing it again. Why????? Because I am a crossdresser and can not help it.
Enjoy Life and everyone in it.
Friday, May 15, 2009, 11:08 AM
Great Post! Thanks so much for posting this!
I'm a young, straight, very normal, woman but some of my closest friends happen to be gay, lesbian, and a few cross dressers.
It completely disgusts me to see the way they are treated by others at times.
As humans, each and every one of us has some kind of "quirk" and anyone that thinks there is one stick "normal" is probably having trouble coming to terms with something in their life.
Someones clothing preferences, or sexual orientation, has absolutely nothing to do with that persons qualities as a human. I really can not understand why so many people think that it does.
One of the most beautiful people I know (internal beauty I mean), also tried to kill himself because he's gay. He was having a hard time coming to terms with it. To think that all of his beauty would have left this world, just because of some close minded assholes that have no idea what some of these people go through, is so disheartening.
Friday, May 15, 2009, 11:32 AM
I am definitely not "grossed out" by cross-dressers/transexuals. I think that if that's what makes them happy, then they should feel empowered to do so.
Luckily, I live in Vancouver BC, which is a very accepting city (one of the things that I love the most about it).
Friday, May 15, 2009, 4:11 PM
many women are kind of like cross-dressers
I think that as women we get the opportunity to wear what many in another era might have considered men's clothing. We can wear pants, and button down shirts etc. For the woman or women who find men cross-dressing as women disgusting, maybe they should take a good look inside of their own wardrobe. I bet that there are many days that you dress kind of masculine. I, for one enjoy the freedom that I have as a woman to dress in a pair of jeans and a non-adorned outdoorsy kind of a shirt, or a pair of pants with a jacket. And I also enjoy dressing cute and girly. Women have a lot of unquestioned freedom to dress more masculine without it being questioned. There are many fights that women still must forge for true equality, but I think we get a lot of freedom with the way that we dress. Maybe some men want that freedom to dress for the days that they want to where something more feminine in mood too. I, for one, embrace equality.
Monday, May 18, 2009, 7:01 AM
I am a straight woman, normal daily garb jeans and a women's tee, feminine without ruffles, pink, cleavage etc. Normal look bends toward the simple and athletic.
I took up tribal belly dancing when recovering from a running injury and to my surprise, adored the costuming. Made a bunch for myself and my daughter. I danced in beads and shells, yard-long fringe, bare middle, henna tattoos, burgundy-washed hair, coin-jangling bra, long skirts and harem pants, noisy jewelry, brilliant colors, scarves tucked here and there, and REALLY dramatic makeup. Only dressed like this to perform events and at some classes. I totally miss it and I am going back to dance this summer.
I am a woman dressing as a totally different woman character that has nothing to do with my daily life, for my own enjoyment and for performance of a dance.
How is this any different from a man who chooses to cross-dress? We are both expressing an aspect of our personality that is artistic, emotional, personal, and gratifies the senses, in a way that hurts nobody. And yes, in spite of the fact that the 5,000 year old dance moves I perform are authentic, artistic, and not sexual in nature, I also got scornful, distasteful, or honestly fearful looks from the occasional person whose comfort level I had exceeded. My own brother had a hard time with the dance.
I trust none of you would discourage a woman who loves to dance in an elaborate costume from doing so. Of course I deplore the honeymoon revelation, but that's an issue with honesty and trust, not an issue with cross-dressing. But as long as a man is honest and clear about his choices and communications, why not just appreciate and even enjoy the fact that we are all wired so very differently?
Tuesday, May 19, 2009, 7:43 PM
PP...couldn't have said it better myself!
Tuesday, May 19, 2009, 10:46 PM
It's not just the clothing
Hi again all
I am so very glad to see that there are at least some that do not get grossed out by men crossdressing. BUT, would you date one? Would you go to lunch – diner or a movie with one? Or would you politely say no for fear of being seen with them or that some kind of trouble may start because of how they was dressed.
For the lack of better words, a ( real ) crossdresser has more issues than just the clothing. Some people can secretly wear a bra or a pair of panties hidden under their cloths and feel like they have done something, especially if they get away with it. Others can wear something feminine once a week and feel better somehow. I wish I could do that, but I can not. Often I must feel and look like a women in almost ever aspect. ( Makeup – cloths – hair – shoes – etc,,,,,, )
When I could, I would and needed to dress for a mood. If I felt like a special diner out I would TRY to look and feel as much like a women dressed up for a nice diner out as I could, but I could not walk outside the door dressed like that. If I felt like a summer BBQ in the yard with a summer/day dress or a pair of skorts on, that is how I wanted and needed to dress. There again I would have to stay indoors and just stare out the window and imagine what it would be like to really go have a BBQ in the back yard or go to diner. It is not that I want to dress like this. I MUST do it or I will go out of my mind sooner or later. So, would a man dressed like this get to you, would you now be grossed out by him or go to diner with him. It is not that I would want to go to diner or what ever with a man or with a woman like on a date or something like that, but to have the right and/or ability to just go at all would be great.
Most of us are not just female want-a be’s all the time. I love my job as a log truck driver and log loader operator. I love riding in rodeo’s ( bare back ) I love to hunt, fish and go camping. I also love putting on a pair of blue jeans, a nice western shirt and western sports jacket, my cowboy boots and hat and go dancing as my self. ( I love the East cost swing dance ) I love holding a feminine woman in my arms and ADORE her for who she is inside – A Woman.
I know women that NEVER dress feminine. They always have a baseball hat on with a pair of jeans and T-shirt with a cigarette hanging out of their mouth that just makes me want to slap the darn thing out of there. But they never have a word said to them or even get second looks no matter where they go. WHY ?
I love to dance and have known others that like the belly dance type of clothing. I never have just because I am more conventional, but it sounds fun because I do like dancing even though it is more on the country side.
Living in a place like Vancouver BC sounds like it would be nice also other than its size. I live in a small logging town as a fourth generation logger and would get publicly castrated and hung if I went out doors here while dressed.
Let’s face it folks. This country no matter what some think is by no means based on equality yet, no where. I went to Las Vegas once to a convention on crossdresser rights. Even there one was not really safe unless in numbers and still heard all the snide remarks and comments. People look at us as if we just killed their best friend or something at times. It is not just disgust but real anger by some.
Even though I will not see it in my life time I feel we all need to just love each other for who we/they are inside. I found out the hard way life is just to short to think we are better than each other just because one has real breasts or has more hair in their chest. Who Cares???? Or who SHOULD care
Enjoy life and everyone in it
Thursday, May 21, 2009, 10:44 AM
Why are you totally disgusted ?
To fear those that crossdress shows that one has cery low self-esteem about herself to begin with ! Let me shine a little light on my situation this way you might understand ! I have gone to psychologists , a psychiatrist ,two gynochologists ,and an endocrynologist ! They have all come up with the same conclusion ! They all have confirmed that I indeed have the brain of a female ,but born in a males body ! I got all the results 11 years ago ,but I could not do anything about it financially ! How would you cope with it if you had always felt you were the opposite gender o0f the one you were born ? It is very painful ! A lot of transgendered individuals that commit suicide do it because of all the negative social pressures put on them ! The sick ones are the ones that don't understand nor try to understand anything about the transgendered ! I hate to break it to these people , but one in five families has either a lesbian , homosexual , transvestite or transgender family member ! You can deny it all you want ! It doesn't discriminate ! It hits the rich as well as the poor ! The rich have the tools and money to hide it more ! There is no way that you aren't going to bump into any of these during your lifetime , so my suggestion to all the ignorant ones is to educate yourselves ! Life is too short as it is ,without hating someone because of their gender !
Monday, November 16, 2009, 4:39 PM
Just so there's not confusion - cross dressing and being transgendered are two different things.
Monday, November 16, 2009, 7:01 PM
Cross-dressing's fun and harmless. I made a video about it for youtube. Hopefully it explains a few things...
Friday, November 20, 2009, 5:18 AM
To return to the original question: "Are women grossed out by cross dressers?" This straight woman answers "no". I'm not bothered by it, nor am I bothered by gays, lesbians, bisexuals, transgendered, etc. To each his/her own. My very best friend is a gay man.
Would I date a straight man who told me he cross dresses? No, only because that is a sexual turn off for me. Is there anything wrong with saying "no"? No. We all have our sexual likes and dislikes. If a polyamorous man wanted to date me, I'd say "no" to that, too. There is nothing wrong with having our own sexual preferences, as long as it doesn't harm anyone else. Thankfully hubby is neither of the above.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009, 11:30 PM
Yeah, I think it's gross. I think it's equally inappropriate when women dress like men.
Friday, December 18, 2009, 7:50 PM
OP: well, I can't speak for other women in the world, but... well, you know that one character in Rocky Horror Picture Show, who created the blond dude and went around in that skimpy black corset thing? ...this woman thought he looked kinda hot. XD
As far as cross-dressing in regular women's clothes goes, one of my male friends in high school once wore a skirt to school. It didn't weird me out at all. They're your clothes; whatever floats your boat.
Saturday, December 19, 2009, 10:24 AM
It depends on how the man looks in the clothes. I've seen clothes on men that were supposed to be men's clothes that grossed me out ~ remember the MC Hammer pants? YUCK.
However, I have a friend at Faire that dresses like the Queen of France and he ROCKS IT!! You'd never know he was a guy unless you got really, REALLY close.
Saturday, December 19, 2009, 11:03 AM
So what's the difference between a guy cross-dressing for a fun night out on the town and a male actor dressing for a female role? The English theater tradition of pantomimes comes to mind...
Wednesday, January 06, 2010, 2:35 AM
I would say maybe .1% of women in the world are into cross-dressers, so you will be struck by lighting, bit by a shark, and survive a plane crash before you ever met someone like that. Those aren't good odds.
And it gets worse because even if you did meet a woman like that, she is likely using you to bolster her own identity as "sexual outlaw" and looks at you as an "erotic novelty" to be thrown away after your value as an erotic stimulant has worn off.
Also, I am a cross-dresser and I'm saying these things. I don't care one bit if you find it disgusting. I would find it equally disgusting if the woman I was with wanted to start dressing as man and treating me like her gay partner, so I can't judge anyone.
The reality is most people like me have a sexual fetish that has the potential for arousal. Meaning sometimes it doesn't feel erotic and that often gets mistaken by the cross-dresser as feeling like there is "a woman inside" them. Many who go down this path end up becoming transsexuals and then later regret having done so.
The wish to express a feminine side is difficult enough but worse is all the bizarre behavior surrounding it that raises even more questions about betrayal, fidelity, trust, sexual orientation and so on. This is because many cross-dressers also have two other fetishes -- bondage and Gynemimetophilia (GMP)which is being sexually attracted to other males who feminize their appearance.
We are twisted cookies for sure, but yet there is little that can be done in the way of therapy or drugs that treat these things. So if they are to be with us as "dark passengers" for our lives then we must embrace them and make them fit into our lives or else they will make you even crazier or drive you to suicide or both.
So you either embrace and face a life alone, lost in some bizarre fantasy world or you try to suppress and end up killing yourself...your choice.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010, 3:47 AM
Yay! I've been waiting for you to come out of hiding and re-re-re-resurrect this tired old thread. (I'm only responding because this thread is near the top of the forum list today.) I crack up every time I read this thread. You seem like a sad person, sharing this info about yourself on a website that's predominantly about weight loss and women's issues. I hope you find the peace you're looking for. In the meantime, I will just chuckle at your attempts to get attention every couple months.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010, 2:55 PM
"You seem like a sad person, sharing this info about yourself on a website that's predominantly about weight loss and women's issues."
Since when is this site primarily about women's issues?
Thursday, February 18, 2010, 4:31 PM
Well, that very much depends on a man's fashion sense (or lack thereof). There's women's fashion I can't stand on a woman, and I don't think it looks any better on a man. If you pick things that actually fit your personality + body - why not :-)
Sunday, February 21, 2010, 7:54 AM
I'm not anyway. I think Lady Gaga is a Man.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010, 1:34 PM
No way am I grossed out by it! I have known straight men that made better money dressing as a woman than most people I know! lol Honestly, I am of the to to each their own mind set. Im bi (yes, I know...most women are...blah blah) and to me, some of those cross dressing men are hot to me in whole new ways! Besides...I'd kill for legs like that.
Thursday, February 25, 2010, 4:50 PM
What a great thread!
I for one am glad to see that anything that can effect your self-esteem/body image can be discussed here, it can have a serious effect on your whole health, body mind and spirit. It can certainly affect your weight. Anyone who doesn't think it should apply doesn't have to read it.
Could I love a cross-dresser, absolutely. I love my boyfriend very much, we plan on spending our lives together. If he came to me tomorrow and told me he needed to cross-dress, it wouldn't change the way i feel about him.
i know a lot of women who run around in men's boxers, i've done it myself. They're comfortable to wear around the house. This does not make me a pervert, i don't get a sexual kick out of it. Whether i'm wearing a woman's thong or mens boxers, i don't find any sexual charge out of it. it's just pieces of cloth that i wear to cover nakedness.
I don't remember remember a commandment saying thou shalt not wear clothes of the opposite sex. And to the person who quoted romans 2:24-"Wherefore God also gave them up to uncleanness...for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature." you're wrong. it doesn't say that. it says-"For the name of God is blasphemed among the Gentiles through you, as it is written." that's the king james version, i prefer the NIV, which says this-
17Now you, if you call yourself a Jew; if you rely on the law and brag about your relationship to God;
18if you know his will and approve of what is superior because you are instructed by the law;
19if you are convinced that you are a guide for the blind, a light for those who are in the dark,
20an instructor of the foolish, a teacher of infants, because you have in the law the embodiment of knowledge and truth—
21you, then, who teach others, do you not teach yourself? You who preach against stealing, do you steal?
22You who say that people should not commit adultery, do you commit adultery? You who abhor idols, do you rob temples?
23You who brag about the law, do you dishonor God by breaking the law?
24As it is written: "God's name is blasphemed among the Gentiles because of you."
I bother bringing all of this up for a couple reasons. At the beginning it says, "behold thou art called jew"(kjv) or "if you call yourself a jew"(NIV) No disrespect to jewish people, but i'm not one, so I guess it doesn't really apply to me.
BUT...Let's just consider this for a moment, he's talking about teaching something then being a hypocrite and doing it anyway. Hmmmmm Kind of like judging others using a bible verse but not obeying Jesus who said "judge not". If you're free to pick and choose which teachings you follow and which you don't then allow others that right. We're all sinners here.
btw, the quote you were looking for was romans 1:24, But it really doesn't matter since, well, did you hear the good news? Jesus died for our sins! that means that loving our neighbor, trying to be a good person, and doing the other various things that Jesus wanted us to do matters more than if i want to wear boxers, or steve wants to wear lacy bikini's.
Back to the real subject at hand. Cross Dressers are deserving of love just as much as anyone else, and while there are a lot of critical, unenlightened people in this world, there are also people who understand that loving means accepting without boundaries. It's worth spending time alone and searching if it means finding unconditional love at the end.
If anyone wonders, i'm brand new to this site. I'm a 34 year old divorcee who understands the battles in life and love and what it takes to make a relationship work, i'm not some young idealist who just doesn't understand life yet. To those of you so called christians who can't find it in yourself to love all of God's children, may God bless you and teach you how to love.
peace, love, and hugs to all.
Friday, February 26, 2010, 2:57 PM
What a great thread!
I have enjoyed reading this thread for some time now as I find it interesting to read the various responses from people. As a crossdresser myself, I appreciate everyone's input and respect their opinions on the subject.
Much of the controversy stems from our societal values, and misconceptons. Crossdressers understand this. We know some people will call us perverts, freaks, and consider us to be sexual deviants. We know some people will immediately assume we must be gay or want a sex change. We know some people will consider it a neurological defect requiring therapy and medication to cure the problem. We know that some people will refernce the bible and/or thier religious beliefs and label us as sinners destined for Hell. We see how crossdressers are portrayed in the media. Trannies get it.
Trannies face a painful paradox. We have this irresistable compulsion to crossdress, but after we do, we fill ourselves with guilt and shame from doing so. You see, trannies themselves are not immune to the impacts of our social upbringing - the share the upbringing that leads many people to dispise crossdressers. We wish we weren't compelled, but we are. I'm not sure people can fully appreciate the psychological Hell trannies put themselves through.
I consider myself fairly lucky as I managed to get past the shame and guilt in when I was young, and simply leared to accept myself as is. And thank God for the internet, because it made me aware that I wasn't really all that unusual.
I think the real reason this thread was posted is because most crossdressers simply want to have an open, meaningful relationship with a woman who can accept their transvestism. And in the ideal situation, the significant other would embrace their transvestism - but those cases are very rare unfortunately.
More women have dated crossdressers than they realize. CDs don't expose themselves to just anyone because of the fear of scorn and ridicule. Only when a crossdresser feels comfortable with someone will they share their secret. And even then, far too many crossdressers remain silent, frequently marrying a woman without telling her. It's a huge mistake, I agree, but I can understand why someone would be so fearful of exposing themselves.
There are some benefits to the women having a relationship with a crossdresser. Most trannies lead very normal lives. They tend to be solid employees and good family men and excellent providers. A woman that willingly embraces our transvestism is likely to be treated like a godess. In my case, I have a pretty good sense of style, and feel comfortable buying clothes for my wife. And I love buying her shoes...Stuart Weitzman, Kate Spade, Jimmy Choo, Christian Louboutin. Most guys don't even have a clue as to what these are.
I think it is true that many trannies want to make love to a woman while dressed. I know that's what I like. And I totally get why that may turn a woman's stomach. However, I also know that the few women with whom I have made love to while crossdressed have told me the sex was very intense.
If you think dating a tranny would be hot, I highly recommend you pursue it. You may find out how great it can be.
Tuesday, March 02, 2010, 9:37 PM
I was less than pleased when I ran into a cross dressing male in the ladies room in a London restaurant once.
Tuesday, March 02, 2010, 10:26 PM
"I have a pretty good sense of style, and feel comfortable buying clothes for my wife. And I love buying her shoes...Stuart Weitzman, Kate Spade, Jimmy Choo, Christian Louboutin. Most guys don't even have a clue as to what these are."
My wife no doubt spends more time prettying herself each day than I do, but she (and relatively few women) put the effort in that a cross dressing man puts in when he dresses up as a woman and walks out his front door. Therefore, having a male partner who knows about shoe and clothing manufacturers is of little use to her and most women.
Men who crossdress are often impeccably costumed and 'aggressively made up'; their costuming is a blatant and flagrant expression of femininity. They may even look so good they can pass a woman. But you see, this is where it crosses the line for most ladies because the man becomes in their eyes a woman...and not just any woman, but a tall, aggressively made up one.
Why is that an issue? Women don't like other women. Women can be great friends with other women, but in certain contexts and often in the case of unknown women, a woman considers another woman, especially one who is making a big deal out of her femininity, as being something of an enemy. Or at least a potential threat.
Some cross dressing men can walk into the new reality of being a female without realizing the full implications of what that means socially amongst other women. When you make your entrance as an attractive woman, you lose your status as an eligible male and enter the ring as a genetic contender. You become the woman other women are jealous of.
Sunday, March 07, 2010, 4:28 PM
To the person that said, "I am TOTALLY DISGUSTED by it." I don't understand. You obviously fell for him before you knew. So just because now you know you left him. I agree that the timing in which he chose to tell you was wrong, he's still the same person you fell in love with. And what was wrong with him asking if you would have his baby? He's not a different species. He's still a human being. Obviously there are women that do enjoy being with crossdressers because you said he found someone that likes to dress him up. I do believe the problem is yours! And to anyone that thinks if a man wants to put on makeup or wear women's clothing makes them gay....let me tell you..Gay means you are attracted to the same sex. Gay doesn't mean you want to wear a dress! People need to educate themselves before they start posting because it only makes them sound like an idiot!
Monday, April 12, 2010, 7:29 AM
I have news for the person that stated that "Cross-dresser = straight
Transvestite = gay
Transgender = "wrong body", some overlap with transvestites but NOT cross-dressers."
All people that dress in the oposite sex they were born with are transgendered. Transgendered is an umbrella term that encompasses all people that dress opposite than what they were born.
Transvestite is an archaic term that means crossdresser. Most crossdressers are men and are straight.
Transsexuals are people that feel they were born in the wrong body and most go for a sex change. Although there are transsexuals that do not go for the sex change operation and are called non-op transsexuals. Most male to female transsexuals are attracted to men which makes them straight. Yet there are some male to female transsexuals that are attracted to females which make them lesbians.
There is a whole spectrum to gender which would take a lot of typing so I won't go into it right now but I do want to say that gender is not the same as sex. Sex is what's between your legs. Gender is how you feel inside and how you act, etc.
Monday, April 12, 2010, 7:38 AM
I am an occasional cross dresser. Have been since I was about 9 yrs old. Is it wrong??? According to the society we live in YES. Is it really wrong ??? I dont think so. Many girls I have spoken to about this and there are a lot, have the opinion that they dont really care and in general it doesnt bother most of the. Would they date or marry a cross dresser?? Some would, most would not. My partner has accepted me wearing fem underwear, but not the whole gig.. Thats cool she loves me and accepts that I am into that, but I also accept that she is not. So I dont push it on her. There is no right or wrong, good or bad. If thats how you feel, thats how you feel !!! Do it, dont do it, whatever you choose is your choice.. I do and I enjoy it and YES it does have a sexual connotation for me. But thats me. So if you like it, you like it, if you dont you dont. If people are to accept any minority groups in this world, whether they are cultural, religious, sexual or any other out of the ordinary group, then we in those minority groups need to accept that not everyone agrees with us. AND they dont need to justify that just as we dont need to justify our feelings, fetishes, likes or dislikes..
Wednesday, July 14, 2010, 12:37 AM
I find it strange that women dislike men in a dress or skirt....and on the other hand love a man in a kilt.....I wear a kilt and have women telling me how sexy it is...go figure
Wednesday, November 24, 2010, 7:28 AM
I personally do not think there is anything wrong with cross-dressing. If that is what the man wants to do and it makes him happy, then why not. Woman cross-dress all the time after all! We wear hoodies and flat shoes and wear big shapeless jackets ;-) But in all honesty, yes. If I see a man who has not shaved his legs, wearing see-through tights, of course I will grossed out! But if he is well groomed, then why not. :-)
Thursday, November 25, 2010, 10:06 AM
Was it hard for your wife to accept at first?
Monday, December 20, 2010, 12:09 PM
To all: Cd`s and women and others who have had their comments on dressing as a woman for whatever reason. I for one have dabbled in crossdressing for many years, since my 20`s I`d say, and I am 46 now. I have never been attracted to men nor do I ever want to be. I do feel a stronger connection sometimes to the feminine side of my own self. It seems this world of women that we grow up around, whether its our mothers, teachers, co-workers, all have their own ideas about how a woman should behave and how a man should behave. So I`m saying this as my experience as a cd, I grew up with my dad gone a lot due to working 3rd shift. Maybe that absence made my connection to my mom closer? Maybe I saw more feminine things that I should have when growing up. Maybe when mom took me shopping in the old department stores of downtown that I saw dressed up women doing the shopping and basically doing everyday things that at the time I didn`t think twice about. But inside me maybe it triggered emotions that I didn`t know at the time would have this effect on me. For example, I hate sports. I hate hearing it on the tv, I hate being around a bunch of guys on monday talking about "the game" sunday or whatever. To me its all a waste of time and energy, worrying about the outsome of a team you have nothing to do with. But to be a male in this society and not like it, then you are gay or something is wrong with you. On the other hand, I like anything mechanical. Especially trains. I love going train watching. So if anyone knows me, and thinks they know who I am by what I`m putting here, now probably has more of a clue that its me now since I said I like trains.LOL. Anyway, society says that because I like to wear feminine garments that I am gay. Well I am not. I do however get sexually excited when I dress up. And dressing up one day may just be me putting on a womans gown and sitting at the computer in the morning with just that, lipstick on and drinking a cup of coffee. Yes its odd, but its not gay. Also when I have done the deed, and you know what I mean here, then guilt sets in and whatever I have on gets immediately taken off and its back to the man clothes.
Another thing to consider here, and I know its true in my case is hormone vs testosterone levels. I for years have had a hard time achieving and/or maintaining erections. It usually just won`t last good enough for full intercourse with a woman. So a lot of my inner feelings emotionally I feel are being directed by 1) my lower levels of testosterone and higher levels of estrogen, and 2) my lack of ability to maintain an erection to satisfy a woman.
I think all of it plays a part in determining whether or not to dress up. I do feel guilt when I do it. But on the other hand when I`ve especially had a long day at work and its friday afternoon, all I can think of is the stress reliever of getting home and beginning my dressing up process, which like I said may just be a few basic things to get me in the mood. To me anyway it takes me out of the man role and lets me live a womans role if just for a moment.
Now lets talk about how women are with men and what they want. They want a man who goes to work, takes care of the family, fixes everything around the house, takes the dog for a walk, repairs the brakes on the car, listens to "her" when she feels like talking, etc.. Then when he falls short on something then he is an asshole that is immature. I`ve seen it so many times when a woman has a good man but enough is never enough for her. Yes there are some perfect marriages, but all in all, I just see too many times where the woman thinks "hubby" is an idiot that can`t figure out how to ask for directions because he is a caveman. Then some wonder why men become gay and go towards men for attention. I was married for 15 years to a woman who already had kids, so my chance of having any I already knew were nil. Yet I stayed with her anyway. But what did she do the whole time I was married to her. Stayed on her pain pills and nerve pills and never held down any job whatsoever. It was me that kept us together and yet for some insane reason I stayed to make a marriage work, knowing that I was losing a chance to have any kids. So my point here is I was sensitive to her as a woman and a wife and a mother to her own kids from another marriage. I tossed my feelings aside for having my own family so I could take care of her and live happily ever after. Blah Blah Blah. Well enough was enough with the pills and such. So I finally had to call it quits because it caused too many fights and she was arrested one too many times for prescription fraud.
I hope some here gets a little better understanding of dressing as a woman by reading my writings. I can`t speak for everyone but I do know that inside me I wish these feelings weren`t there. I also sometimes am glad they are there. Go figure!! Another thing I`d like to add here. I, now more than ever, feel the need to pamper myself, for example putting lotion on my elbows, arms, legs, chest etc just to make me feel better about myself and my looks. I want to feel softer to the touch, not harsh rough dry skin when touched. That too may be connected to my lack of testosterone and higher levels of estrogen. In case some of you don`t know, when the male body loses its ability to generate testosterone, it is replaced with estrogen. Transsexuals go to doctors to get estrogen shots to make their appearance more feminine and their moods and everything changes when they start getting these shots.
Sunday, January 23, 2011, 2:26 AM
For one, everyone has their own measures of what appears sexually attractive. So I would not go so far as to judge people by their methods of judgement.
However, I must point out to those women who on this site claim that it grosses them out to see a man cross dressing in women's clothes that -
1. if you as a woman wear trousers, jeans, t-shirts ... that's crossdressing too!
2. you are most likely here to loose some weight ... remember the thing about not throwing stones at others if you live in glass houses?
I noticed that someone above said that crossdressers are narcissistic. Yes, some of them may be. They may have misdirected their attraction to themselves. Some might crossdress because it gives them sexual arousal. Some because it helps they are brilliant minds who love to explore life. Some because it helps them rebel against the binary of gender in society. Some because it helps them feel right about themselves ... closer to the transgender or transsexual concept. There could be numerous other reasons.
However, when a woman would not date a crossdresser because she believes that he is narcissistic and hence would not focus his efforts on her, I have to wonder, is the woman narcissistic too? Why should she be the sole focus of his life? Should he abandon his own comforts, sacrifice his inner needs, .... all just so that she could achieve he fancies?
Yes, some women may not be sexually attracted to men in women's clothing. Some other women may be interested. And some other women may be interested in a completely feminine man who could pass for female.
I live and work as female, although I am genetically male. Nobody knows about this at my workplace. I work in a top job in a top company as a woman. And I am a huge trans advocate. I did need to come out to a few people though over the last few years to be able to transition socially.
I am not transsexual though. I am transgender. I do take hormones, but I love my male parts. I am attracted to women, and many women are attracted to me, but they think I am a straight genetic female. The best thing is that I can still look male if I want to - and all I need to do is to shave my head (I know because I have experimented socially)
Are women grossed out by me? Well, they don't know. You need to know before you feel grossed out.
So before you throw a stone at a crossdresser, just think about this - I may be your female friend or acquaintance whom you have known for some period in the last 8 years during which I have lived as female.
Monday, April 11, 2011, 5:31 AM
i need help.
hi, can you pls get in touch with me.. I had a cd boyfriend and have depression since I found out, I need to talk to someone about it that can understand how I feel.. Thank you
Sunday, May 22, 2011, 5:37 PM
I can't help as have no knowledge in this domain but just wanted you to know that someone should get back to you soon with some advice.. but while you waiting sending you a hug. (also depends how you found out.. if he told you, I personally think that it was probably a big thing for him with share with you and he trusted you to tell you.. but I don't know the situation and never been in that situation) but if it happened to me and I wasn't expecting it, I'd definitely be in shock and most probably no too sure.. but IF I loved him, it would be part of him, and then for me to decide if I can accept it..
Sunday, May 22, 2011, 6:09 PM
Well then, I love you and you are wonderful and I wish you all great things
because...All my life I have been an ardently indulgent, avidly intense, unwaveringly dedicated transvestite. So much so that even though I like girls I never got married nor even ever had a girlfriend as my choice because I was afraid that doing so could interfere with my crossdressing! Not only am I totally over the top, girly girl extreme to the max, I love referring to myself as a wuss, a pansy, a pantywaist, a sissy, a pu--y, and especially a fairy. I've always declared that a genie could come to me today and tell me that with a snap of his fingers he could make me the most studly, most handsome, most sought after man on Earth, with the world's most gorgeous girls falling at my feet, begging to spend quality sex time with me any ya know what I would do? Truly and certainly I would squeal in fright and run (yes, like a girl) to the nearest group of genetic, natal females and cower at their feet, crying like a sissy, begging them to hide and protect me from the mean, evil genie who threatened to masculinize me! You could lock me in a beach front condo with Claudia Schiffer, Cindy Crawford and Elizabeth Hurley, with all three of them being at their horniest and with them agreeing that they must do everything I tell them to and ya wanna know what I'd 'make' them do? One would have to set and style my hair, one would have to do my makeup and the third would have to do my nails and other misc stuff needed to fully feminize me. Then, while I'm all dolled to the max in a fluffy, lacy, swishy, girlish prom dress and painted like a princess, and them wearing jeans and T-shirts, I would 'make' them take me out for cocktails and treat me like "just one of the girls", ideally taking me to a busy sports bar packed with strong, muscular, manly, masculine men and their gorgeous, sexy, girlfriends and make me serve cocktails while they flirt with the masculine men while laughing and making humiliating comments about my obviously non existent manhood. I would love to be all girly princess fairy dolled up while at half time, during a superbowl game, and stand in the center of the field and say through the PA system something like: "I am an absolutely hopelessly indulgent pantywaist transvestite and I LOVE being so!".
Friday, June 10, 2011, 2:27 AM
"Straighten the Record
To set it straight. These are the diffences.
1)Crossdressers - are straight, but like wearing womans clothes.
2)Transvestites - are gay and like wearing womens clothes.
3)Transexuals - believe they were born the wrong sex and wish for a sex change.
.......just for the record. "
WRONG! Transvestites are NOT always gay. There is zero correlation between sexual orientation and transvestism. I know as fact because I am a hetero transvestite!
Friday, June 10, 2011, 2:32 AM
Excuse me. I'm a transgender person, Transgender, crossdressers, and transvestite, are mainly straight. 90% of us are straight, the other 10%, are gay. This is where people get us confuse. A transexual is a person that changes thier sex.
Friday, October 21, 2011, 11:11 AM
Who cares what any of you think anyway? You just like to argue!! (ALL OF YOU)
Thursday, October 27, 2011, 5:02 PM
It's always sexual
Sunday, November 13, 2011, 5:02 AM
I dated a crossdresser for two years, I was shocked when I found out. He assured me that he was straight, for him it was VERY sexual! When he was dressed he wanted to be bent over and penetrated. He would often turn down sex with me and go get dressed up and masturbate with his toys. This was the biggest insult for me! Not to sound conceited but I'm very attractive and always have gotten a lot of attention from men. Then finally, I fall in love with a guy, and he'd rather have sex with himself dressed like a woman! I grew very bitter through the relationship, then come to find out, he is having cybersex online with other men! I am broken from this experience, he is on Match.com looking to date women, I wish I could warn them...
Sunday, November 13, 2011, 5:23 AM
Most men who dress as women want to have sex with men.
Monday, November 28, 2011, 12:10 AM
are women grossed out by crossdresser
I would just like to comment to the wonderful lady who said she had a male customer come into her shop and she helped him pick out dresses and made him feel safe and comfortable with each other.
I really admire her for not being judgemental and treat him like a freak. This lady is very special and I wish all females were like her.
Here is a cross desser who is not out abusing women actualy we worship them and would love there support. We are not selling drugs or beating up women.
Not one CD has ever been acussed of rape, abuse or not acting as perfect a women as he can.
we work very hard to look as passable as possible and it takes along time not to make fun of women but to be as wonderful as they are.
A gay man would not dress as a female he is looking for a male, think about it. Would being gay man be looking for a date with a women, or would a gay man wear a dress to have another gay man pick him up, i don`t thing so.
I have gone on to long but my best wishes for a happy Holiday to all the pro women and also the anti women.
Love and happiness
Jenny a TG
Sunday, December 18, 2011, 12:40 PM
Are *ALL* women grossed out by cross dressers?
Absolutely not. I LOVE my local Ladies of Perpetual Indulgence and enjoy seeing them in full makeup/wardrobe every year at our Solstice Parade/festival.
Am I sexually attracted to cross dressers? No. We're all allowed to be attracted to whomever we're attracted to and cross dressers don't do it for me. But that's ok, right? As long as the person's an adult, I can be sexually attracted to whomever I want, shouldn't I?
Live and let live.
Sunday, December 18, 2011, 1:17 PM
Are women grossed out by cross dressers?
Seeing my husband of 30+ years suddenly choosing to wear my makeup, wigs, and clothing - including my high heels - has been unsettling to say the least. I get the feeling he is trying to find his indentity all over again and it saddens me. It confuses me, too, because he's always been a self proclaimed homophobic. The worst thing of all is that it is a sexual turn off for me at a time he seems to desparately need me to be attracted to him. Honestly, it creeps me out.
Tuesday, December 20, 2011, 11:18 AM
And cross-dressing should be a problem for women because?
Clothes are just clothes. They are man-made (or human-made, I should say). Anyone who objects to anybody wearing any kind of clothes is just plain silly or has a brain filled with dung.
Women who are turned off or turned on by their husbands wearing one set of clothes or another externally are superficial. You don't love your husband! You just love your fiction about his masculinity which his clothing means to your imagination.
To the men who cross-dress, do it early in life and do it well. Don't do it to mock women. We women have hairy legs too, but we shave them before wearing skirts or dresses. If you want to cross-dress, shave your legs, take care of your body, eat well, stay in shape, and become role models we'd be jealous of or want to copy. That's how to cross-dress. Oh, and wax your chest and your back and your arms too if you want to expose those!
Of course many women will be shallow, but women do not come with the word shallow written on our foreheads. It is our shallow behavior and attitudes which will reveal our shallowness. You need to create that circumstance in which you can detect our shallowness. That's how you know whether you like us or not. If you find us too pretty, then imagine the name of the ugliest woman you've ever met, and put her face on ours. Then think, with your brain. That will help you eliminate the shallow ones among us. Don't stop cross-dressing just because some shallow women objected.
So tell us early in dating that you cross-dress. Heck show up on a fifth date cross-dressed, just warn us before you show up though. If we don't like you on that fifth date, dump our shallow asses and move on. You have power too, you know! You don't have to please us by being our servants, door men, bodyguards, comedians, chauffeurs, massage therapists, money slaves, etc, despite what some of us say. You have to live your life. If our needs are compatible with yours, we'll join you. The worst case is that you will be married when you are 38 or 45 to a woman who appreciates the true you.
There will be ignorant people everywhere. If you are going to live your lives to please them, you will always be a doormat and you will always remain repressed. You don't ask us permission before you need to go pee. Some of you need to cross-dress. You do not need to ask anybody permission.
Finally, there's nothing hotter than a man who is secure about himself, including his feminine side, and can demonstrate confidence in exactly who he is without always trying to seek approval before he does something he needs to do. So I say ignore the shallow beatches and be exactly who you need to be, and the right women for you will be with you.
Never lie, to yourself or to the ones you love, even if you think that honesty will break up your relationship or potential relationship, because if you have to lie to keep the relationship, it will end sooner or later anyway when you cannot lie anymore.
Friday, December 30, 2011, 7:00 AM
Some women object because ...
In simple words, they are shallow, ignorant and immature.
For many women, it is the fear of "what will
say if they find out?
For many women, their entire and only value they bring to your relationship is their femininity. If you are feminine too, they have not much more of value to bring to your relationship, according to them. That threatens them.
For many women, they have imagined all their lives a certain stereotypical male as their husband. If you break that myth in her mind, she will feel her world fall apart.
For many women, growing up is hard and being called lesbian in school used to be a slur. Being straight and being known as straight has become an essential part of her identity. Being with a man who cross-dresses questions her identity label, and that upsets her.
For many women, it's purely religious. At some point, some pastor or supposedly devout person informed them that people 2000 years ago who actually wore unisex robes supposedly wrote in a book that men should not wear women's clothing. That, or the belief that such rules are written and are meant to be obeyed, is important to these women.
For the rest, it's just inertia. We tend to think of life in a fixed compartmentalized way. Anything that deviates from our understanding of the norm makes us think a little extra hard. Most don't enjoy that. Change is disturbing to us, to everyone actually. So if you tell us 30 years into a marriage that you like to cross-dress, that disturbs our inertia.
Finally, the only reason anyone who is supposed to love you would object to your clothing is because that person does not really love you the person.
If I love you, I would not abandon you even if you are burned beyond recognition. That's what love means. Love is about the affection to the person inside you. It goes deeper beyond the skin. If someone's love for you stops at your clothing, you seriously have to question what kind of attachment the person ever had to you.
Friday, December 30, 2011, 7:29 AM
To the PP
You always crack me up when your little troll self pops up here every few months or so. Hate on women all you like. This site is about loving ourselves. It is also ok for us to be attracted to whomever we are attracted to. Make your judgments and we will continue to get a chuckle out of your posts.
May you find some peace within yourself in the coming year. Good luck.
Saturday, December 31, 2011, 1:36 AM
tr.v. fazed, faz·ing, faz·es
To disrupt the composure of; disconcert.
(tr) to disconcert; worry; disturb
[variant of feeze]
Saturday, January 28, 2012, 11:47 AM
"...no-one batters an eye..."
one bats their eyes;
another batters something to fry;
yet even worse, some people batter other people and/or animals
Saturday, January 28, 2012, 11:51 AM
And here I thought a fez was a hat.
Saturday, January 28, 2012, 8:25 PM
hi there just joined this site,i am a 57 year old transvestite,or crossdressor,im still physically male,my name is lesley from the uk,and feel so much better in myself since i become one,i tend to dress old to avoid any hastle i may get,im not gay,i know some people find it hard to understand people like myself,and i do get some people snigger and comment,but when i think back when i used to dress has a male it just made me feel suicidal,so i can handle the comments i may get,better than feeling that way,by the way my name is lesley,which by the way happens to be my real name
Saturday, March 17, 2012, 1:10 PM
Wow how sickening... I am getting a divorce because of this bullshit!! You might think a little crossdressing here and there is harmless but wait until you find your husband listening to brain wash tracks that he stole someones college debit card to purchase from the internet!!!!!! Wait until he neglects you and your child in order to stare at himself in the mirror while he rubs all over himself for 2 hours and smears makeup all over his face.. when he takes all of your clothes and jacks off in them and you have to throw them away because you can't look at them anymore!.. This isn't just some simple little turn on its SICK AND DISGUSTING and it has RUINED my FAMILY!!!
Friday, March 23, 2012, 11:56 PM
is this thread still running
Monday, October 29, 2012, 3:59 PM
No, I'm not grossed out by crossdressers at all. People should be able to dress the way they want, and be who they are. They should do what makes them happy.
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Wednesday, April 20, 2016, 7:49 AM
You are wrong with your definition of the word transgender. Transgender is an umbrella term. Any gender varient falls under it. Crossdressers, transsexuals and any other gender varient are transgender. I can't believe how many people do not know the correct definition of the word transgender.
Saturday, June 04, 2016, 10:03 AM
Just wow! You must not get around much. There are lots of crossdressers that look very much like women. There are lots of transsexuals that look like women. Just because you might not have seen them doesn't mean they don't exist. Yes, there are crossdressers and transsexuals that still look like men, but not all of them. You are right though. Clothing and makeup doesn't make woman. Crossdressers do not want to be women. They just want to wear female clothing and makeup. Some crossdressers want to look like women part time. Some only want to crossdress in the bedroom or house. Transsexuals want to live as a woman. Most of them have the operation and go on with their lives. You never know how many crossdressers and transsexuals you have been around and you didn't even know it.
Saturday, June 04, 2016, 10:16 AM
You Are So Wrong
And I'll tell you why. Not all crossdressers that appear in public dress the way you say they do. And transsexuals do not dress that way at all. They want to blend in not stand out. You don't know how many crossdressers or transsexuals you might have been around and not known they were crossdressers or transsexuals. I think you are just trying to pick a fight here because you aren't happy with your own life
Saturday, June 04, 2016, 10:22 AM
If you don't want to see your neighbor walking around they way they are dressed then move! You don't have to like it. And don't ask why you should move. You should move because you are the one that has a problem not your neighbor. And no you cannot compare a shooting with crossdressing. That's absurd! One people get hurt. The other nobody gets hurt. But people do have the right to dress and live the way the want as long as it doesn't hurt anyone. Maybe your neighbor doesn't like a particular outfit you wear. Should they tell you not to wear it? You are filled with hate and you need to find a way to unload it.
Saturday, June 04, 2016, 10:29 AM
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