Can someone please help me....I am at a breaking point...

I wrote a few months ago....i am going to be 47 this year..I had lost a great deal of weight and was at my thinnest in 2008.....gained 90% of it back..now I am about 80 pounds overweight.... I really do not know how to go on anymore. I have been out of work since October and am really depressed...I am on Weight Watchers and I have been doing well over the past few weeks...this week is different...I think I am going to gain 6 or 8 lbs at my weigh in on Monday...the trigger for this was that I did not get a job that I interviewed for....I wonder if my weight has anything to do with it??? Even my mom said that if I lose weight it will help in me finding a job.

I do not have the desire to do anything....I am sitting here watching TV, eating and drinking......and nothing healthy of course!!!

I am also trying to study fot Certified Managenent Accountant exam and feel like I cannot do that either....

I feel sooooo hopeless....

Maria

Sat. Feb 4, 6:41pm

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Thursday, December 14, 2006, 3:32 PM

Maria-this is the first step. Reaching out for help.

Starting tomorrow. Take a walk. Winter is hard. I'm not sure where you are, but maybe you are lacking in Vitamin D. Do not start taking anything for it, but get out and walk. The first day start at 10 min. Do that until it becomes easy. Then up the amount of time when you can. It will decrease your appetite and increase your metabolism.

Don't give up TV at once or eating or drinking. Walk first for a week. The next week reduce a little tv, food, and drinking. Cut out one bad food or drink. Little by little get back to what worked for you before.

Baby steps.

I agree with your mom in once aspect. Losing weight/exercising will make YOU feel better and give you more confidence, which will help you get a job. I don't think it is all about weight, but how you feel about yourself and the confidence you exude.

Maria-you can do this! You've done it before, so you know that it is possible.

There are lots of people here to help. Look for some good groups or start your own.

One more thought. Drink lots of water.

Saturday, February 04, 2012, 8:34 PM

The job thing sucks. You can't change the fact they selected someone else to fill the position. What can you change? Like the other person who responded said small steps. Walking is a great thing and you can get out there. At one point I was feeling so bad, both physically and mentally, that I gave myself one year to see improvement or I was done. I made me my job. I have organizational skills and research skills. I used those to plan a way out. I researched about my medical conditions. I set the timer and made myself stay up and active for 15 minutes at a time. I started walking and committed to noticing 3 things that I would come home and write down. Like --I saw a lady bug, the neighbor has a new car. Nothing earth shaking but it helped somehow.
If you have been successful before you can and will be successful again. I believe in you and expect the best for you.

Saturday, February 04, 2012, 10:40 PM

Great comments from the pps. It sounds hokey, but what you focus on grows and expands. You feel hopeless? You then act hopeless. Think your weight was the reason you didn't get hired? Next interview that fills your head and that's the vibe you send out from the second you meet your interviewer, which overshadows any competency or skills you have to offer. Everything becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.

Change the script you have about your life, your abilities, and your goals. Trying to study means you don't really plan on accomplishing that. Make the decision that this is NOT the life you want for youself and take each day 15 minutes at a time if you need to. Consider it akin to training for a marathon, which cannot be done without effort, sweat and guts - not to mention the discomfort that goes along with pushing yourself out of your comfort zone and toward your goals, but it's all for the bigger goal of getting across that finish line. A single mile isn't so grand, but when you're just starting it feels overwhelming. Then when you can string together 26 of them, wow, you feel like you can rule the world. Approach your day like a marathon and you're at mile one. Getting off the couch for 10 minutes to do something good for youself seems huge right now, but start there and work on stringing more and more of those together. Eventually, you may start to feel a shift.

Sunday, February 05, 2012, 9:47 AM

Thanks everyone for all the great feedback. I know that I can do this and I also know that I will have to take this slowly. I would love to get The Point of No Return program and give that a shot. I may have to wait until I get a job, though.

What are some good groups here on PEERtrainer?

All the best,
Maria

Sunday, February 05, 2012, 7:39 PM

hey Maria.. I lost my dad in July and I haven't been focused either. we control our choices. start with small steps. walking whatever, but just start. MOVE.. get active.
some tough love here.. this is what I tell myself.. excuses or results.. well I have been making enough excuses. want to join me in getting results.. you did it once come on lady you can do it again!

believe in yourself.. that butterfly wants back out.. the only one keeping her trapped in is YOU.. decide ccommitt.. succeed.. I will walk hand in hand with You.. I need to release 50 pounds.. so how bad do you want this..

so you didn't get the job.. life happens its not always fair, but you cant let circumstances in your life derail you. I have been doing that with my dads death, but Im done making excuses..

i want this and i will do what it takes to get there.. so come on girl.. get your head back in the game.. you are worth it.

start small.. power of 3.. exercise, water, fruits and veg.. you can do this!!

lynneta

Sunday, February 05, 2012, 10:16 PM

thanks lynetta...i have been making plenty of excuses, too. I'm sorry about your dad. I know it is tough...I lost my sister 2 years ago and then the day after, my mother-in-law passed away....that is when I started putting most of the weight back on.

I want to do this!! Everyone seems so supportive....I am going to check in here every day to get motivated!

I am afraid of getting weighed tomorrow and I hope I don't let that get the best of me.

How long have you been on PEERtrainer?

Maria

Sunday, February 05, 2012, 11:43 PM

Oh, sorry I spelled your name wrong lynneta...

:)

Sunday, February 05, 2012, 11:46 PM

just call me lynn.. all my friends on here do.. I have been with PT for close to 4 years now

sorry about your losses.. lets stop making excuses and lets start gettimg results.. what do you say?

Monday, February 06, 2012, 1:35 AM

Maria-- you have recieved the greatest advise --CHANGE THE SCRIPT....
Test and join a variety of groups/teams, look for the right fit for you personally.. And don't forget, the more you comment the more people respond -- ACTIVITY, is key be an active member and MOVE....

Monday, February 06, 2012, 7:41 AM

I do like that, too...CHANGE THE SCRIPT...that is exactly what I am going to ....I am going to start living the life i see for myself! And I am going to check out all that PT has to offer.

Thank you all so much!
Maria

Monday, February 06, 2012, 8:55 AM

how you doing maria..

i resisted cake today and thought of you!

lynneta

Wednesday, February 08, 2012, 6:32 PM

Maria

I understand your situation Maria. I've been where you are. I gained 100 pds taking care of a disabled parent. It has taken me years to learn how to keep weight off and I'm still struggling with the remainder of the weight I need to let go of. It's not what you're eating... it is what is EATING YOU!

What I learned over time was to... GET OUT OF THE HOUSE... online support is great, but you need human contact. Try to focus on things "outside" of your situation. I volunteered at a school helping children with reading 1 day a week while I was off work, the local Senior Centers can always use volunteers. Look for free classes to attend, etc. You're STILL young!

Know that letting go of excess weight is a journey involving learning lessons re the mind, body and spirit. We must all take whatever time we need to learn the lessons so that we can move forward to optimum health. You can do it, you are worth it, you are valuable.

Wednesday, February 08, 2012, 9:22 PM

hi lynneta,

thanks so much for thinking of me!

that is great!! everytime we build our "resistance" muscle, we are one step closer to our goal!! YAY!

I had a very good day Tuesday, Wednesday was the total opposite! but I wk going to make today (Thursday) a better one!!

:)

Thursday, February 09, 2012, 2:41 AM

Thanks so much for the encouragement! I know losing weight is a journey and that I need to give it time and learn things about myself.

You are right, I need to get out of the house and do things and be social...I know that will help me.

I am so glad I came to PEERtrainer!!

:) Maria

Thursday, February 09, 2012, 2:47 AM

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Just saw this. I am so sorry, I can relate. How are you doing now? I joined OA and I am doing fabulous!! in Sept I will b amember 3 years! I am down over 80LBS.

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