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My friend always competes with me about her kids
I don't care! I'm happy they're doing well and she always shoves how well they are doing in my face. How do I gently let her know that there is no need to compete?
Mon. Feb 17, 11:25am
Tell her that her kids may be great but Peelouts kids are the best. lol
Tuesday, February 18, 2014, 12:20 PM
I had a painful-to-be-around associate who behaved this way. Sometimes I would jokingly say, "Are we making this a competition? You don't need to compete with me!" and laugh it off. I realized that she did this with everybody, and not just me. But still, it's no fun to be around perceived pettiness like that.
I am mindful of this around others now. I would be mortified to ever come off as a person absent of social tactfulness as my painful-to-be-around associate. I do want to brag about my gifted child, but I don't because I don't want to potentially alienate friends with kids of different abilities.
The other week my daughter and her bff got their report cards, and my daughter's bff was asking, 'Who is smarter?' and then she compared report cards :\ My daughter had straight A's and the bff had B's. I told the bff that grades aren't everything, and that she could do things and knew about things that my daughter didn't know, and that my daughter probably knew and could do things that she didn't know. Everyone has their own unique strengths. I also told her that grades don't show the bigger picture. Sometimes kids test better, but they don't fully internalize the material, but only regurgitate.
I think you just have to realize folks might be doing this one-upmanship because they want validation and admiration. They don't realize they come off as idiotic social misfits.
If this is a really good friend, maybe you can say something gently? They will only alienate good people, like you, with their reckless childish behavior. We all want to hang out with people that uplift us and make us feel good about ourselves. If they drain your spirit, you need to take action. They have some serious work to do, and sometimes you just can't save folks like that, no matter what you say. Perhaps you might want to consider not spending so much time with them anymore. for now. Find others who empower you and who are a joy to be around.
Friday, April 11, 2014, 1:20 PM
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